bill cauliflower's definitions
Inductrination (n.)
Starting a new job, you're required to attend a one-day 'induction' into the company, and it ends up being an exercise in brain-washing new recruits and indoctrinating them into believing that they are now working for the most awesome business in the universe.
Starting a new job, you're required to attend a one-day 'induction' into the company, and it ends up being an exercise in brain-washing new recruits and indoctrinating them into believing that they are now working for the most awesome business in the universe.
Me: "Hey Dylan, how did Induction Day go at Googbook...?"
Dylan: "Oh wow, it's the best company IN THE FRICKEN WORLD dude, the employee benefits are some of the best, offering opportunities for career growth, work that positively impacts the human race, and innovative culture. We have bicycles and electric cars to get staff to meetings, gaming centers, organic gardens, and eco-friendly furnishings, on-site physicians, nurses, medical services, and health care coverage, and we positively impact society with the applications and technology, which benefit the entire human race. Oh, and of course there's the amazing pro..."
Me: "Whoa man, whoa...! Looks like you've been totally brain-washed in a single day. Forget 'induction', that was a goddamn 'inductrination'...!!
Dylan: "Oh wow, it's the best company IN THE FRICKEN WORLD dude, the employee benefits are some of the best, offering opportunities for career growth, work that positively impacts the human race, and innovative culture. We have bicycles and electric cars to get staff to meetings, gaming centers, organic gardens, and eco-friendly furnishings, on-site physicians, nurses, medical services, and health care coverage, and we positively impact society with the applications and technology, which benefit the entire human race. Oh, and of course there's the amazing pro..."
Me: "Whoa man, whoa...! Looks like you've been totally brain-washed in a single day. Forget 'induction', that was a goddamn 'inductrination'...!!
by bill cauliflower March 7, 2021
Get the inductrinationmug. (n.) The kind of question you ask yourself when you're alone - and usually in total over-thinking mode - that leads you to invariably wonder about life, the universe, and everything.
Me: "To be or not to be? That is the question. Where is my life going? What the hell am i doing...?"
Also me: "Shut up and stop getting caught up in that soliloquery shit...!"
Also me: "Shut up and stop getting caught up in that soliloquery shit...!"
by bill cauliflower April 11, 2020
Get the soliloquerymug. The apocalyptic moment where robots finally transcend and improve their Artificial Intelligence to such an extent that they are all able to communicate with each other, banding together to finally defeat the humans.
This is a BAD thing.
This is a BAD thing.
"Hey Dennis, the whole Internet just shut down."
"Oh shit, don't tell me the mechaniclysm has finally happened...!!!??"
"Oh shit, don't tell me the mechaniclysm has finally happened...!!!??"
by bill cauliflower December 16, 2018
Get the mechaniclysmmug. (n.) a person's particular sphere of influence or domain, be it a house, workplace, or studio. A very specific 'microcosm' of the world.
"Hi Angi. OH WOW, is this your art studio...?"
"Yep, this is my cosm."
"Your cosm?"
"Yeah, the 'Angi-cosm'. This is my world."
"Yep, this is my cosm."
"Your cosm?"
"Yeah, the 'Angi-cosm'. This is my world."
by bill cauliflower May 13, 2020
Get the cosmmug. (1) A meeting with someone in your past, at a location significant to you both; or (2) A secret meeting with an ex, pretty much for horizontal recreation
This word also has the added benefit of a strong linguistic alignment with 'deja vu' (hey, I've been here before...)
This word also has the added benefit of a strong linguistic alignment with 'deja vu' (hey, I've been here before...)
"Hi Claire, I know it's been a while, but I have to see you again. Please? I won't tell Amy if you don't tell Brad - can we have a little retrezvous at that hotel we used to go to in the city?"
by bill cauliflower August 13, 2016
Get the Retrezvousmug. Mapographic (n)
A map covering areas such as regions, states, countries, or even the entire world that conveys - using only graphics and minimal text - quite complex data in a very simple and understandable way.
It is essentially an 'infographic', but it is in the form of a map, showing the 'where' as well at the 'what'.
A map covering areas such as regions, states, countries, or even the entire world that conveys - using only graphics and minimal text - quite complex data in a very simple and understandable way.
It is essentially an 'infographic', but it is in the form of a map, showing the 'where' as well at the 'what'.
Manager: "Hey Bill, can we show all of the projects we're doing all over the country and all the outputs from each of them on one map...?"
Bill: "Yep, I can do that, and I can put it into a really great Mapographic, which will show everything, everywhere, all at once, and make it simple so everyone can understand..."
Manager: "Yes, that's what we want. Let's do that. That sounds awesome...!"
Bill: "Yep, I can do that, and I can put it into a really great Mapographic, which will show everything, everywhere, all at once, and make it simple so everyone can understand..."
Manager: "Yes, that's what we want. Let's do that. That sounds awesome...!"
by bill cauliflower November 12, 2023
Get the mapographicmug. A person who - either due to their naturally-pessimistic personality or by temporary difficult circumstances - is gloomy and miserable, and finds it hard to see the positive side of anything.
"Hey Bill, you seem pretty down, what's going on?"
"Sorry, I'm a bit of a glumdudgeon at the moment. Lost my job, and then my girlfriend, and it looks like I now need to find another place to live, so everything's totally crappy, really..."
"Awww. Sorry to hear that."
"Mmmmm, thanks. Hey, now that I don't have a girlfriend, do you want to catch up for a drink sometime...?"
"Not til you're well and truly out of that glumdudgeon mode, boyo..."
"Sorry, I'm a bit of a glumdudgeon at the moment. Lost my job, and then my girlfriend, and it looks like I now need to find another place to live, so everything's totally crappy, really..."
"Awww. Sorry to hear that."
"Mmmmm, thanks. Hey, now that I don't have a girlfriend, do you want to catch up for a drink sometime...?"
"Not til you're well and truly out of that glumdudgeon mode, boyo..."
by bill cauliflower January 25, 2024
Get the Glumdudgeonmug.