Definitions by analex127
mollend
When a penis has a large mole like tumor on the end of their bell end or on the bell end, which sometimes engulfs the entire bell. This makes it hard to clean away any excess smeg, so in a way is a natural smeg hat.
Smeg scorpions
Smeg scorpions are tiny scorpions which live inside your foreskin and feast on excess smeg. They are impossible to remove as they crawl into the deep recesses of your foreskin, but that's what you get for smegging faggot! To appease the scorpions you must masturbate at least 5 times a day otherwise they will get mad and sting the meaty bit within your foreskin. And trust me.. this hurts! By the way circumcised people CAN get them too... gutted.
Smeg scorpions by analex127 September 19, 2009
dick squelch
The noise made when you are in the bath and you "take care of yourself" above the water, but some water has got into your foreskin so it squelches, this is usually done instead of below water as the splashing noise usually gives it away, however dick squelches are even more obvious then below water "dick splashes".
dick squelch by analex127 January 23, 2009