al-in-chgo's definitions

eight inches

An erect penis length that about one out of fifty men has, but about one out of ten claims.

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Q: What's a Gay Eight?

A: Six inches.

Q: OK, so what's a genuine eight inches?

A: No one I know (sighs).

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by al-in-chgo May 16, 2010

pun

A play on words. Generally a pun takes a word that is quite understandable in context and replaces it with a homonym (same-sounding word) to create an entirely new meaning, or replaces a word with a similar-sounding one to the same effect.

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A pun involving a word with two possible meanings --

Nurse, to young woman about to receive a vaccination:

"You're going to feel a little prick."

Woman: "It wouldn't be the first time."

* * *

A pun that uses a similar-sounding term to the expected one, to humorous effect --

A one-liner: "JFK's private life was so sexy they should have called his administration Cum-A-Lot."

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by al-in-chgo March 13, 2010

Jes sayin'

A mild dialect-in-writing variant of "just sayin'," a phrase that follows a statement or affirmation that might potentially give offense in order to defuse any insult.

Standard English equivalent = "No offense."

"You buzzed that guy in? Suppose he was some sort of murderer or rapist?"

"That so-called murderer and rapist just happens to be my brother."

"Jes sayin'."

by al-in-chgo October 31, 2013

Verschlusspanik

Verschlusspanik (fair-SCHLOOSE-pah-neek) is a German word that literally means "closing panic." It refers to the rush of new investors (and new capital) into consumer investments like mutual funds that occurs when the sponsoring financial house announces that its fund will no longer accept new accounts beyond a certain date. That "last-minute" stampede is due to Verschlusspanik on the part of potential investors who do not want to be shut out of the fund.

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"Go figure -- Fund XYZ announces that it won't open any new accounts past the end of this month, and all of a sudden there's a huge influx of new investors and their money."

"That's called 'Verschlusspanik'. It often happens when there's a deadline for new accounts imposed."

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by al-in-chgo March 24, 2010

The Valley

Abandoned prison restroom with long trough-style urinal off a low-traffic area, as described in John Cheever's 1977 novel FALCONER. To quote the author, this is where the inmates went after dinner "to fuck themselves." Themselves but not each other -- there were unwritten rules. Looking at other penises was okay, but not into another man's eyes. Touching another man was not allowed, except for the shoulder. A grim place, not gay by any definition, and certainly not the fantasy one-for-all tearoom scenes depicted in gay porn videos.

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Since The Valley in Cheever's award-winning novel Falconer was located on an upper floor, the origin of its name was obscure. Perhaps the name was coined to reference the trench- or trough-shaped nature of the elderly urinal itself.

-- "Where's Harry?"

-- "He went to The Valley after dinner."

-- 'When do you think he'll be back in our wing?"

-- "As late as possible, if I know Harry."

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by al-in-chgo February 25, 2010

Arpad Miklos

Hunky, Hungarian-born gay actor and model, and quintessential "muscle bear". Miklos lives in New York City but appears in erotic vids filmed on either coast.

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"Who was that great-looking guy with the wide smile?"

"That was Arpad Miklos who, as usual, played the top."

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by al-in-chgo March 3, 2010

virgule

Typesetter's name for a "regular" (pre-computer-era) slash mark (/) that associates related terms. On computer QWERTY keyboards, commonly found to the right of the key for a period. The virgule key + shift indicates a question mark.

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Here's one use of the virgule: Most of the audience found the play racy/dirty, not just racy.

by al-in-chgo March 3, 2010