Definitions by YAWA

'roid tits

In an exhaustive attempt to stave off the physical ravages of time, many aging males resort to the use of HGH, Testosterone and/or other illicit or unsupervised hormone replacement protocols. Unfortunately, the metabolism of these agents may result in an excess of available Estrogen which causes unwanted, unexpected and permanent development of breasts.

YO! Check out Roy! He's got 3% body fat and is as strong as a fuckin' baboon ... too bad about the 'roid tits.

YUP, guess who's saving up for surgery...

'roid tits by YAWA July 6, 2018

digital dead walker 

The most horrific example of social media consumption; creating a seemingly mindless, autonomously functioning individual with all attention focused exclusively on the hand-held device interface, at the exclusion of all other surrounding conditions.

Holy shit, did you see that!? Another digital dead walker just bit the dust! This one fell down through an open man hole cover while attempting to cross the street...stupid fuckers.

digital dead walker by YAWA July 1, 2018

grudge flight 

Private airtravel chartered exclusively as a glaring middle-finger payback-display, serving to symbolically right decades of accumulated dysfunctional family wrongs...

No tickets. No reservations. No invitation.

We decided to crash the graduation ceremony anyway.
What we DO have is a private jet carrying a big 'ol grudge flight, fuck you...

grudge flight by YAWA June 17, 2018

Toddlerbrain-Science

The extension of extremely basic, if not primative, child-like problem solving skills into an adult decision-making environment--where making good decisions based on sound principles of reasoning REALLY fucking matters.

My mommy says that all my prayers will be answered, that I'll see grandpa and kitty-cat in heaven and that all I really need to be successful in life is faith in our divine creator.
<<Really? You're twenty-fucking-five years old. You have no job, lodging or source of legal tender. You are an adult, totally dependent on yer 'mommy' for existence... I've got an idea! Why don't you shit in one of your hands and have god shit faith in the other...see which one fills up first. Without doubt, your Toddlerbrain-Science will serve you well...

Toddlerbrain-Science by YAWA June 16, 2018

Insta-Cum Retraining 

A highly-structured desensitization program designed to reestablish normal sexual stamina after many years of forced, infrequent, dispassionate and time-constrained copulation efforts.

My wife just signed me up for Insta-cum retraining...seems she requires a bit more time and expertise then when we fucked on prom nite...

Insta-Cum Retraining by YAWA June 13, 2018

Outsider-Test of Faith 

With so many unique, often opposing, religious Directives, Dictates and Dogma--is faith really the strong foundation and reliable measure of truth on which to base belief?

So, what's the best definition of faith?
How about: pretending to know something that you don't know.
Take the Outsider-Test of Faith and see if your personal savior, shake, shayman, god or other mythologic figure survives the challenge...

Outsider-Test of Faith by YAWA June 10, 2018

asparagasp 

An involuntary, defensive reaction resulting from unexpected exposure to highly offensive asparagus piss-odor.

Oh snap! I forgot about eating all of that damned asparagus at dinner. Got up to piss and was slammed in the face by the stank...asparagasp got me, bro!!

asparagasp by YAWA June 2, 2018