Untar la Manteca's definitions

Fox in the box

In the sport of football, it is a center forward / striker who doesn't run much and can be ghostly sometimes, but when the ball enters the final third, he will always magically be positioned in the right place at the right time, and if the ball is passed to him inside the box, he becomes unstoppable, and will certainly score.

Erling Haaland is the best fox in the box in the history of the sport. At Dortmund he did more things other than score, but at Manchester City he has discovered his true self, and now he has every record involving goals that you could possibly think of.

by Untar la Manteca August 22, 2025

Andre Onana

Manchester United's non-goalkeeper / goalletter. Signed by the notorious idiot Erik ten Haram for 50M quid after kicking club legend David de Gea out of the club, it has since become apparent that Onana had been cosplaying as a footballer all this time. His hands are made of poppadom and he is often called Dracula because he too is allergic to crosses. He is the type of goalkeeper that strikes confidence into the hearts of the opposition.

"AAAAAAAAAAAA FOR FUCK'S SAKE ONANA YOU FUCKING TWAT" - Mark Goldbridge after watching Andre Onana make his 69th blunder of the season

by Untar la Manteca August 10, 2025

Box-to-box midfielder

A football player whose natural position is in the midfield, but who runs a lot and can also help with the attack and defense if the situation demands it.

The best example of a box-to-box midfielder is Fede Valverde. He usually plays at central midfield but he can also score banger long distance goals and his secondary position is right back. He is one of the most complete footballers in the world.

by Untar la Manteca March 15, 2025

His legs have gone

Said of an ageing footballer to mock their lack of pace or just general washedness

"His legs have gone" - Jamie Carragher, talking about Casemiro at Manchester United

by Untar la Manteca February 22, 2025

Antony

A guy who plays for Manchester United and is the butt of many a joke because of how bad he is and the fact that he costed 100 million. In the 2023/24 season, he played 29 Premier League games and had a whopping 2 G/A while playing RW. He is mostly known for spinning with the ball and also for fucking things up out of nowhere.

Antony is 3 goals away from scoring a hat trick

by Untar la Manteca July 23, 2024

🐢

Kylian Mbappé

Kylian Mbappé looks a lot like a turtle 🐢

by Untar la Manteca July 20, 2024

floatboat

A luxury sedan that prioritizes comfort over handling and performance. Used in a derogatory way by fans of sports sedans, which are the opposite.

Float: The objective of this type of cars is to isolate the driver from the road, which makes them feel like they "float" above it.
Boat: Because handling is not the priority, they can be hard to maneuver, a characteristic they share with actual boats.

These cars are typically preferred by older people because they offer a relaxing ride, whereas younger people prefer sport sedans for being more fun to drive.

Dad, your old Caddy is such a floatboat. When I drive it, it's hard not to fall asleep. My new Mercedes is so much better

by Untar la Manteca September 17, 2023