The process of when the semen from a freshly ejaculated penis never actually separates itself from the semen in the urethra, leaving the portion of semen that escaped dangling loosely in space and unable to be claimed as a "cum-shot." This is common with men who are dealing with dehydration or the common cold.
Man: Dude the weirdest thing happened to me last night.
Friend: Go on...
Man: I was drilling this chick and pulled out to spray her in the eyeball and my load never left my dick!
Friend: Ahhhh the ole Colorado Cliffhanger!
Friend: Go on...
Man: I was drilling this chick and pulled out to spray her in the eyeball and my load never left my dick!
Friend: Ahhhh the ole Colorado Cliffhanger!
by Uncle Gary's Potato Farm April 28, 2017
Referring to the dinosaur that spits a tar like substance at Newman (from Seinfeld) in Jurassic Park (the Dilophosaurus), this term occurs when a male is banging a chick, then pulls out moments before climax and breaks both of her elbows (preferably in Steven Segal fashion) and then finishes by pumping off all over her face. Her arms will then be limp and incapacitated, her hair will expand and freeze to either side of her head by way of the semen, and her shriek will mimic a dinosaur, making her appearance akin to the aforementioned Dilophosauraus.
Dude: I kind of feel bad for nutting on my girlfriends face last night.
Friend: Don't. I broke my bitches elbows and then nutted on her. Made her look like a Dilophosorepuss.
Friend: Don't. I broke my bitches elbows and then nutted on her. Made her look like a Dilophosorepuss.
by Uncle Gary's Potato Farm June 22, 2017
When a female, usually a filthy whore, gets double penetrated (in both holes), and each guy blows their respective loads inside. The female then stands up and simultaneously rips a hot fart and a queef resulting in 2 powerful streams off jit (cum) shooting ferociously downwards resembling someone wearing a jet pack during take off.
Slut: Hello, I need my carpets cleaned. The stains are massive and in 2 spots.
Carpet Cleaning Service: How did this happen mam?
Slut: Well I guess you can say I rode the jit pack.
Carpet Cleaning Service: This doesn't explain how it happened.
Slut: Fine. Timmy and Earl put there 6 inch veiny meat whistles into my ass and cunt and busted a gooey nut into each. I stood up and ripped ass and vag and shot 2 ropes of jit all over the rug.
Carpet Cleaning Service: Now that explains it. (pukes)
Carpet Cleaning Service: How did this happen mam?
Slut: Well I guess you can say I rode the jit pack.
Carpet Cleaning Service: This doesn't explain how it happened.
Slut: Fine. Timmy and Earl put there 6 inch veiny meat whistles into my ass and cunt and busted a gooey nut into each. I stood up and ripped ass and vag and shot 2 ropes of jit all over the rug.
Carpet Cleaning Service: Now that explains it. (pukes)
by Uncle Gary's Potato Farm May 26, 2017
The act of shooting a hefty cumshot across the room and getting some on the tv and passing out before cleaning, resulting in a nice jizz crust cover that would need to be chiseled out if left long enough
T-Rex: bro, I saw the best porn last night. Sware my load hit the fucking ceiling fan and splattered everywhere.
Big Easy: remind me to never visit you. Did you clean the tv?
T-Rex: I didn’t clean Shit. No clue where it went.
Big Easy: here (hands over a jack hammer) you will need this. Take these also (hands him 4 beers), have fun ice scraping.
Big Easy: remind me to never visit you. Did you clean the tv?
T-Rex: I didn’t clean Shit. No clue where it went.
Big Easy: here (hands over a jack hammer) you will need this. Take these also (hands him 4 beers), have fun ice scraping.
by Uncle Gary's Potato Farm April 22, 2019
When you haven’t seen your significant other in a long time so you wait for him/her with open arms and your cock flopping around in the wind waiting to release the build up of splooge all over their face or tits.
Tyrant: I hate the fact that my girlfriend lives on campuss cause I never bang and always have to wack my lil pecker.
Big Easy: when she cums home you should throw her a nice welcum reception and shower her with tiny little pearly white gifts!
Big Easy: when she cums home you should throw her a nice welcum reception and shower her with tiny little pearly white gifts!
by Uncle Gary's Potato Farm August 24, 2019
The act of murdering the nostrils of many people in a crowded area by placing a big gulp filled with asparagus piss and a frozen shit log in a low key spot and allowing the musTURD gas to thaw. If done in an enclosed area, should result in roughly 11-19 people throwing up in less than an hour after placement.
Tyrant: What you do this weekend?
Big Easy: I am going to hell. I assassurinated like 50-60 people at Toy Story 4 yesterday.
Tyrant: The fuck is that?
Big Easy: I placed a 17 inch deuce into a 42 oz big gulp slushy full of asparagus piss and placed right under the seat in the third row. It was horrific. So much puke. It was all fun and games until 6 year old's were puking on their infant siblings, and the parents were pushing chunks from the sight and smell of it all. Gonna be hard to whack off tonight.
Big Easy: I am going to hell. I assassurinated like 50-60 people at Toy Story 4 yesterday.
Tyrant: The fuck is that?
Big Easy: I placed a 17 inch deuce into a 42 oz big gulp slushy full of asparagus piss and placed right under the seat in the third row. It was horrific. So much puke. It was all fun and games until 6 year old's were puking on their infant siblings, and the parents were pushing chunks from the sight and smell of it all. Gonna be hard to whack off tonight.
by Uncle Gary's Potato Farm June 21, 2019
The act of putting your penis into your own ass (or vagina in the rare case your are born with both) and pounding away against your own will.
Man: (sobbing) I got moleincested last night.
Friend: What does that mean? What happened?
Man: Well, last night I was really drunk and passed out. Woke up to me drilling my own asshole.
Friend: What does that mean? What happened?
Man: Well, last night I was really drunk and passed out. Woke up to me drilling my own asshole.
by Uncle Gary's Potato Farm April 07, 2017