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Tuftskins's definitions

butt picker

A loser who mooches off of others until his/her times runs out. See also "couch surfer". Butt pickers lack any sort of motivation. Some are sociopaths, true users, but most are lazy indolent types who seek out helping hands to screw over. Get a life, butt pickers.
Although he was a talented carpenter, Johnny was too lazy to find a steady job, and instead chose to lounge around as a butt picker, watching the TV and eating the food of whoever bought his sorry stories.
by tuftskins May 22, 2010
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Necktie Cult

The Federal Government. The politicians, lawyers, journalists, bureaucrats, lobbyists, and other hangers-on who parade in front of TV cameras, trying to make us think they really matter.

So named due the astounding preponderance of neckties worn by all involved.
Big Bear: "Looks like the Necktie Cult wants to raise taxes again."

Heather: "Mmmm. Good thing we're tax rebels!"
by tuftskins March 23, 2010
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Farrow

(verb); also "Farrowed"

To put under a love spell. To completely intoxicate and arouse with a combination of mystery, humor, wit, sexiness, intelligence, spark, and dark passion.
Matt: "Roger, what's up with you? You look like you're on Cloud fucking 9!"

Roger: "Ahh, I have been Farrowed, my friend. Sooo nice!"
by tuftskins March 20, 2010
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co-worthless

A lazy, unproductive co-worker, whose lack of work ethic means you have to work that much harder to carry their load.
My co-worthless Lester called in sick again and now I'm stuck covering his graveyard shift. I hope the little weasel gets sick for real!
by tuftskins January 27, 2010
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cracker rap

Commercial country music. Not the classic stuff, but the twangy modern mass marketed country that's all about trucks, cowboy hats, etc.

Like rap music, every singer sounds the same and sings about the same stuff. Unlike rap, it's aimed at white people, or at least some white people.

Rap for hicks.
It seemed like every truck stop Jamie stopped at between Minneapolis and Spokane was blaring cracker rap on the outside speakers.
by tuftskins January 19, 2010
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smooth-chested prettyboy

Hairless males (usually shaven) who dominate advertisements, as well as gracing the covers of celebrity magazines and romance novels everywhere.

It might be part of the metrosexual movement, and hopefully, it doesn't lead to a societal norm of hairy women.
Married to Big Bear, who has a chest like a rug, Heather finds the proliferation of smooth-chested prettyboys in popular culture annoying.
by tuftskins January 10, 2010
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Globull Warming

Junk science that claims man can make the earth's temperatures rise. Recently proven to be bunk, based on lies. Gee, we can't make it rain in LA, but we have the power to change the planet's temperatures...riiiiight.

Globull Warming is a con game designed to make a few people rich with scare tactics. It's followers are a cult, and they are now at the Jonestown stage.
It's 5 degrees in Spokane, WA, right now. Fuck Globull Warming!
by tuftskins December 10, 2009
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