Telephony's definitions

poo-poo spray

Any type of air deodorant / air freshener that comes in an aerosol bomb (spray can).

{Marge}: Homer, did you just leave a big fat shit in our toliet?
{Homer}: Yes dear, and I even remembered to flush!
{Marge}: The bathroom stinks to high heaven; next time please use the poo-poo spray, ok?

by Telephony July 30, 2016

I've Been Sittin on the Toilet

A phoney-bologna fake made-up song, sung to the tune of, "I've Been Working on the Railroad".

♫ I've been sittin on the toilet ♫

♫ All the live-long day ♫

♫ I've been sittin on the toilet ♫

♫ Just to piss my life away ♫

♫ Don't you hear the whizzer flushing ♫

♫ Sleep in so late in the day ♫

♫ Can't you hear your neighbour yelling ♫

♫ Quick, get the poo-poo spray! ♫

by Telephony July 30, 2016

On the Rag Again

A phoney-bologna fake made up song, sung to the Willy Nelson song, "On the Road Again".

♪On the rag again!♪
♪I just can't wait to go on the rag again!!♪

♪The life I love is making music with my (menstrual) pads♪
♪And I can't wait to go on the rag again!!!♪

♪On the rag again,♪
♪See those bloody tampons swirling down the toliet!♪

♪She's a fucked-up friend♪
♪Keeps insisting that those panty liners keep coming...keep coming!♪

♪On the rag again,♪
♪I just can't wait to go on the rag again,♪
♪The life I love is making music with the head,♪
♪And I can't wait to go on the rag again!!!♪

by Telephony July 28, 2016

goat the tolet

This is how some people (esp. elderly women) pronounce the phrase, "go to the toliet".

{Norm}: Cummon Helen, let's go!
{Helen}: Hang on a moment Norm, I need to goat the tolet before we leave.

by Telephony July 19, 2016

peecat

A cat that smells like pee because another cat pissed on the peecat while it was sleeping.

Fade is a peecat. I gently stroked his back and part of his tail and my hand smelled like cat piss.

by Telephony July 17, 2016

Twenty Stick-Very-Twirly-Stick

What you can call the year 2016.

So-named because when viewed from above, it really does look like twenty (20) stick (1) very twirly stick (6).

{From a daily update to a BBS about wheelchairs & scooters}:

01-17-16 {or "2016 17 Jan.", or even "January 17, Twenty Stick-Very-Twirly-Stick" if you prefer}.
Just making my daily check-in from Tok AK. USA...my people (who live in Nicaragua) we have but one bunghole...er...uh...I mean I only have a sodding Cingular update planned for my website today...it concerns my having added an aerial video of flights of my Syma Fiery Dragon F1 Single-Rotor R/C Helicopter to my website.

by Telephony July 4, 2016

blown rubber

Plain & simple: a used condom.

Look behind the bar! There's a fucking blown rubber back there!! Who the hell had sex there last night?!?

by Telephony June 14, 2016