Telephony's definitions

Tweety Turd

Another name for that pitiful excuse for a used douche president Donald Trump.

I see that Tweety Turd now wants to create a Space Force just so that he can waste more of OUR money. Your tax dollars at work here folks.

by Telephony August 11, 2018

toliet fart

A fart that happens when somebody is sitting on a shitbowl and they decide to cut the cheese.
Farting while sitting on a toliet causes the fart to be amplified by the bowl and gets a bit of reverb action going as well for the same reason.

{John}: Jesus! Mary just cut a toliet fart!! You can hear the fucker halfway down the block!!!

by Telephony February 12, 2015

walltoliet

Another name for a wall-mounted porcelain urinal.

Gary, call the plumber! Somebody shoved paper towels or something into that walltoliet and flooded it!!

by Telephony November 29, 2010

faggy clothes

Another term for, "gay apparel".
N.B., the word gay didn't mean back in the 19th century when the song, "Deck the Halls" was written what it means in the 21st century. :-/

Definitions:
19th century: Gay = bright & lively, NOT homosexual.
21st century: Gay = a total faggot man! Do I have to spell it out for you? ;-)

Deck the Halls: how it's supposed to go:

♫Deck the halls with boughs of holly, ♫
♫Fa la la la la, la la la la. ♫
♫Tis the season to be jolly,♫

♫Fa la la la la, la la la la. ♫
♫Don we now our gay apparel, ♫
♫Fa la la, la la la, la la la. ♫

How it COULD go:

♫Deck the halls with boughs of holly, ♫
♫Fa la la la la, la la la la. ♫
♫Tis the season to be jolly,♫
♫Fa la la la la, la la la la. ♫
♫Putting on our faggy clothes, ♫
♫Fa la la, la la la, la la la. ♫

by Telephony November 11, 2016

Meat Santa

A butcher; especially in the month of December.

{Butcher}: Here's your prime rib, all wrapped up real nice.
{Customer}: Thank you, and have a merry Christmas, Meat Santa!

by Telephony December 5, 2018

ashhole

An inconsiderate smoker.
The ashhole will flip lighted cigarette stubs out of his automobile window, crush out his used siggerets on the sidewalk instead of extinguishing them in a sand urn or putting them back in the pack, continue to smoke around a nonsmoker who asks him politely to move (the ashhole just sits there like a lump of coal), drop cigarette stubs into a beer can at a party without telling anybody which can, etc.

Josh, move the hell away from that lady! She's politely asked you twice to move, and you just sit there puffing away. Jeez you're such an ashhole!

by Telephony June 23, 2018

shiiiiTAKE (mushrooms)

You use the phrase, "shiiiiTAKE (mushrooms)" where you might otherwise use the word, "shit"; such as if there are young children around or if you're on forums (or, "fora" if you want to be a dick about it) where the words shit and shittake are forbidden or censored (yes, a forum that I'm on censors the word shittake!!!).

{in a room where a toddler is present}: Gosh I don't want to go; I feel like shiiiiTAKE (mushrooms) this morning.

by Telephony October 22, 2019