Definitions by THE REAL MAYO MAN

PetSmart 

Sells sick and dying animals and doesn't think that sand can cause impaction.

RIP Dart the Bahaman anole. Cause of death: Respiratory Infection that PetSmart sold him with.

PetSmart by THE REAL MAYO MAN July 27, 2021

I can change

A song from the 1999 movie South Park: Bigger, longer, uncut.

Some people say that I'm a bad guy
They may be right, they may be right.
But its not as if I don't try
I just fuck up. Try as I might.

But I can change, I can change.
I can learn to keep my promises, I swear it.
I'll open up my heart and I will share it.
Any minute now I will be born again.

Yes, I can change, I can change.
I know I've been a dirty little bastard.
I like to kill, I like to maim, yes, I'm insane, but it's okay 'cause I can change.

It's not my fault that I'm so evil
It's society, society.
You see, my parents were sometimes abusive
And it made a prick of me.

But I can change, I can change!
I can learn to keep my promises, I swear it!
I'll open up my heart and I will show it...
Any minute now I will be born again!

What if you remain a sandy little butthole?

Hey Satan! Don't be such a twit.
Mother Teresa won't have shit

On me!
Just watch, just watch me change here I go I'm changing!!!

Heeeeeeey Satan!

I can change by THE REAL MAYO MAN July 16, 2021

PETA 

Pieces of shit.

PETA: *kills 10,000 pets and doesn't care*

Also PETA: *shits their pants because someone is trying to enjoy a glass of milk*

PETA by THE REAL MAYO MAN June 28, 2021

Granola bar 

ACCORDING TO C2 DATABASES WORLDWIDE, THE GRANOLA BAR HAS BEEN OFFICIALLY CROWNED THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF A FRIENDSHIP.

Granola bars are the only good part of friendship. So make sure to buy a granola bar and give it to a C2.

Granola bar by THE REAL MAYO MAN May 27, 2021

c-2 

c-2 stole my granola bar!

c-2 stole my g r a n o l a b a r .

c-2 by THE REAL MAYO MAN May 27, 2021

C 2 

C 2 steals peoples' granola bars, usually creating fake "friendships" to take granola bars from people. Because of this, only become friends with a C 2 if you have a lot of GBs on hand.

C 2: Person 1 gave me so many granola bars this past week.
The Other C 2: Really, how many?
C 2: 17, plus a packet of fruit snacks.
The Other C 2: Whoa

C 2 by THE REAL MAYO MAN May 27, 2021

C-2 

steals granola bars, creates friendships that revolve around granola bars, granola bars.

Person 1: (whispering) I finally found a way to eat a granola bar without C-2 taking it.
C-2: Oh, REALLY?

C-2 by THE REAL MAYO MAN May 27, 2021