Covidiots are those people who refuse to take the novel coronavirus, COVID19, seriously. They do not practice social distancing. They do not stay at home. They do not cancel parties.
Amy: Why are all of those people still going to the beach for Spring Break in the middle of a global pandemic?
Toby: Because they are Covidiots.
Whenever you say that you don't give a fuck..you must not give a fuck FULLY. You dont give half a fuck, a quarter fuck..You don't give a mother or a brother fuck..YOU DO NOT GIVE ANY AMOUNT OF FUCK. You have to be stingy with your fucks..protect them..Like drops of water in a drought, such are your fucks..and you do not give them..EVER
Person: Help! I am dangling off a cliff..I am about to fall to my death! I need a fuck to save me!!
Me: Sorry..I don't give a fuck..
Person: But I will die! I just need ONE LITTLE FUCK!!
Me: Hold on let me just looook....Nope sorry..I have no fucks to give..
Images, clips, people, memories, ect..stored in your brain that you pull up into your minds eye when you masturbate..
I have Captain Jack Sparrow and King Leonidas in my Spank Bank.
When a promiscuous girl is so fast she doesn't even have time to take a bath between sexual encounters, so she washes her cooter and ass off with a sink and a rag...Keep in mind you do not have to be a ho to take a ho bath..
Sarah: Come to town with me!
Betty: Okay let me wash off real quick .
Sarah: We don't have time for all that come on!
Betty: I'm just gonna take a ho bath real fast!
Instead of a Family Tree, this term refers to a family derived from a lot of incest.
Jed: Shit, you know they all marry their cousins!?Inbred sons of bitches ain’t got a Family Tree, they got a Family Wreath!
Whenever you are about to shit on yourself and you finally sit on the toilet, the feces then explodes from your asshole. The speed and force from which the shit is ejected causes it to splatter all over the toilet. The thousands of little poop spots that look like freckles on the underneath of the toilet seat are known as shit spatter. It is caused by shit flying out of your butt at such a high speed.
*Husband lifts toilet lid to take a piss..*
Husband: WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED IN HERE?!?!
Wife: Whatever do you mean sweetheart?
Husband: There is fucking HIGH VELOCITY SHIT SPATTER EVERYWHERE!!
Wife: Omg. I am so sorry. I had a belly ache.
Husband: Hell yeah you did, you nasty bitch!
*Husband and wife both laugh out loud.”
A setup for a “Deez Nuts” joke.
Jaime: Hey, I was wondering...Do you ever miss Bofah?
Jaime: Yeah, Bofah deez nuts in yo mouth!