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Definitions by Robert E. Porter

(n.) Putrefaction of the pussy, a chronic condition resulting in the most foul-smelling meat wallet found in the universe. The discharge from cuntosis can be smooth or lumpy like the mouth-watering giblet gravy your grandmother used to make.

(See also: cuntitis, a less virulent variation of pussy pathology than cuntosis.)
The doctor's head was half way to the floor when the fetid odor of cuntosis reached his nostrils.
cuntosis by Robert E. Porter September 12, 2007
(n.) A prostitute that smells like a maggot-infested corpse, due to not bathing for 4 weeks at a time. Any sclut can also be a scumbag slut, and vice versa.
Rob: Hey, Bernice, what's that smell?
Bernice: Whut smell you talkin' 'bout?
Rob: It must be the aroma of your dirty rotten putrid snatch.
Bernice: Prolly so. I done me a hunert-foty johns dis month.
Rob: Oh God, go CLEAN that snatch, you sclut!
sclut by Robert E. Porter September 6, 2007

mouthwash 

(n.) For straight men, it's cunt juice. For gay men, it's cum. Same for gay and straight women.

See cum and cunt juice.
See also snowball.
Gay:
As I blow you, you're going to shoot your white hot mouthwash into my open oral cavity.

Lesbian:
Belinda took all of Stephanie's mouthwash down her throat while they were munching monkey.

Straight:
John and Mary gargled each other's mouthwash and hummed a tune simultaneously.
mouthwash by Robert E. Porter August 10, 2007
(n.) A form-fitting garment for women in the Victorian era. Also worn as a cumcatcher by Madonna for Warren Beatty.
Oh shit, Warren. You spunked all over my fucking bustier again. Vogue.
bustier by Robert E. Porter August 2, 2007
(n.) Information assumed to be false or of questionable authenticity. Synonymous with bullshit.
What you're telling me is a bunch of hoojar, you lying bastard.
hoojar by Robert E. Porter August 2, 2007

Yodeling in the Canyon 

She hadn't been in my presence for five minutes before I was yodeling in the canyon.

muffdiving 

(1) A very popular pasttime - eating pussy.
(2) (gerund) To be in a state of giving a woman oral sex.
"Forget the bar scene," Julie said. "Let's go to my place for some muffdiving."
muffdiving by Robert E. Porter April 8, 2006