Wesminster Dog Show Aunts

Beloved relatives whose sensibilities and lifestyles nonetheless confound others in the family.
A disclaimer often accompanies a Wesminster Dog Show Aunt, such as "We love Aunt Jenny, but she's a little different. In fact, that's why we love her."
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Kite-Flying Parents

Back-to-the-earth parents who would rather their children find creative ways to express themselves than play competitive sports like soccer.
Kite-Flying Parents think that painting the top of an umbrella with festive finger paints or making bird feeders out of pinecones and peanut butter are activities that are better suited for children.
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Genealogy Grandparents

Grandparents who repeatedly inform their grandchildren, and their friends about their lineage.
Genealogy Grandparents will tell the cashier at Linens 'n Things that their lineage can be traced back to Charlemagne
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Dry Lumps

the quietest person in the office during the workday, but after a couple of drinks at the company picnic she's ready to lean over a balcony Mardi Gras-style and take her top off for Girls Gone Wild
Dry Lumps are shy and 100 percent business until one drop of booze transforms her like a shot of Jekyll's formula.
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Splinters

People who defy the rules of breaking up.
Splinters often have knee-jerk responses to "I'm sorry, sweetie, but this isn't working anymore" and will reply with "Oh yeah, well, you're a whore"
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Giggler

No one is quite sure what he's laughing at, but as soon as the office has finally become quiet you can count on hearing his high-pitched tee hee hee
Some think the giggler has discovered the Warn button on Instant Messenger and this is the source of his joy.
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Chihuamos

Gay men who accessorize with tiny dogs to help pull their wardrobe together.
Chihuamos often own bulldogs, shih tzus, pugs, Jack Russell terriers, and other pint-sized to small dogs.
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