Definitions by Quagmire Ton bastardo
4GFap
A roaming data 4G wank where one purposefully disconnects their device from the wireless network beforehand as it may be frowned upon by the owners - e.g. a church, funeral home or work lavatory
My God the widow is fucking smoking hot in black - I’m going for a 4GFap once I’ve given her my deepest sympathies y
4GFap by Quagmire Ton bastardo September 15, 2022
Afterburners
Afterburners by Quagmire Ton bastardo February 6, 2021
chimpface
The way an avid drinker will purse their lips in order to get the very last drops of alcohol from the bottom of the glass
chimpface by Quagmire Ton bastardo December 29, 2020
Mad cow disease
Chronic condition whereby twice a day milking just doesn’t cut it. Self milking can occur up to six times especially if the hot cleaner bends over a lot.
Mad cow disease by Quagmire Ton bastardo December 12, 2019
Howdy Stranger
The art of lying on your arm to numb it and make masturbation feel like someone else is doing it. Can be accompanied by wearing rings and nice nail polish for males.
Howdy Stranger by Quagmire Ton bastardo November 15, 2019
Thonged Avenger
Name given to a usually male masturbator who utilizes discarded dirty female underwear pulled down over his face like a super hero mask to savor scent, but also to keep his hands free for strenuous self abuse.
Instead of being a super hero fighting crime - he’s more of a super weirdo fetishist “fighting” himself
Instead of being a super hero fighting crime - he’s more of a super weirdo fetishist “fighting” himself
My wife left some creamy musky underwear discarded on the bathroom floor - the thonged avenger made an impromptu appearance.
Thonged Avenger by Quagmire Ton bastardo November 15, 2019
Hot points
The indentations on the lower back / upper butt more commonly known as “Dimples of Venus”. Possessed seemingly exclusively by smoking hot bitches.
Hot points by Quagmire Ton bastardo November 15, 2019