QuacksO's definitions

gonnacallogist

A "girly-junk" doctor who specializes in treating women who get excessively concerned when fellow humans are tardy about phoning them at a pre-arranged time, especially when they're horny and the person who'd promised to CALL them was a well-hung stud who was GONNA meet up and have sex with them.

A gynecologist is not typically trained to be a talk-therapist, so if you are sad because a dude either didn't ring you up as promised or was not very punctual about doing so, then you would want to consult a guynocallogist or a gonnacallogist, respectively.

by QuacksO August 26, 2024

sangxiety

Emotional distress suffered either from:
(1) Wondering if your musical vocalizations are/were/will be satisfactory to your audience, or
(2) Having to agonizingly listen to horrifically-awful vocalizations dispensed by someone who did NOT experience much if any of da caring/concerned feelings described in Example #1!

In da humorous "face da music" article in an old issue of "Readers Digest", said article's author opines dat a juvenile-court judge's forcing a habitually-delinquent teen to suffer da sangxiety of hearing his mom sing "America the Beautiful" on da court karaoke would be a much-more-effectively-unpleasant punishment --- and a far greater deterrant of future crime --- than da standard penalties of jail time, community service, etc.

by QuacksO April 29, 2022

mirrorcle

What Alice discovered regarding da powers of da looking-glass in her bedroom.

Considering dat da evil Queen smashed her silvered-glass appearance-checker in crybaby fury when it gave her news dat she didn't like, it was a total mirrorcle dat said reflective visage-viewer could later continue telling her about da relative attractiveness of herself compared to Snow White.

by QuacksO December 30, 2023

faucet flatulence

Refers to the noisy whooshy spluttering in your pipes when turning on a spigot, often heard when doing so for the first time after having the water turned back on, and so there is lots of accumulated/trapped air in the plumbing that has to be "exhausted".

I just about had a heart attack in first grade when the tap on the sink in the boy's room started making loud popping and banging sounds --- and erratically spewing frothy water --- while I was washing my hands. Well, after all, what with my being only eight years old at the time, and with the washroom's echoey concrete walls and floor amplifying and distorting every little sound, it was only logical that I would have been terrified at this unexpected occurrence --- so much so, in fact, that I frantically called the Principal down to show him. He was totally understanding and sympathetic, gently explaining to me that there was nothing to fear; it was just faucet flatulence.

by QuacksO May 6, 2019

Tennissee

Da Central-East American state where Reebok sells a lot of sports footwear.

Did Tennissee da same thing dat Arkansaw? Dunno, Alaska. Tenni saw Della wearing her brand New Jersey to da racquetball court.

by QuacksO March 14, 2019

adoughbe

What you make bricks from to build a bakery.

Probably da term "adoughbe" could also sarcastically refer to da lousy baked goods dat someone created --- "Goodness, this bread is as hard as a rock --- what'd they MAKE it out of --- aDOUGHbe?!"

by QuacksO April 25, 2022

persuede

To use your elegant footwear to convince someone to do your bidding.

I love giving cute chicks a footrub, so da best way dat a gal could "persuede" me would be to actually toss aside said classy shoes and offer me her bare tootsies!

by QuacksO October 21, 2024