QuacksO's definitions

released on bale

What "non-carnivorous" suspects --- i.e., individuals in legal trouble for crimes other than da hazardous-to-humans offenses like violence, murder, etc. --- can get from a "kangaroo court" if they "pony up" a set amount of "hay".

If a judge allows you to be "released on bale", ask him if he wants said "green stuff" to be in alfalfa or timothy.

by QuacksO April 4, 2022

Sears & Roedoe

Da brand name of da feminine-themed line of products marketed by da "first to fix prices" retail giant.

"Sears & Roedoe" may indeed be da "better-half equivalent" of da classic store name, but da also-opposite-sounding names "Sears Rowback" and "Sears Rowforward" are actually pretty much da exact same thing, in dat they both indicate how unreliable your boat's rear-mounted putt-putt is; in fact, da "row forward" motor is evidently even worse than da "no power on da return trip" model, if it actually craps out even before you get very far underway!

by QuacksO January 2, 2023

s. m. c. back-clap

Stands for Simultaneous Mutual Companionable back-clap, and is used to describe the warmly-affable gesture that two super-sociable best friends (usually two cool dudes, but hot chicks occasionally share one, too, or a guy and a sturdy-figured cutie) perform to signify an agreement, encourage each other to begin a boring/difficult/disgusting task, start off on a stroll together, etc. It simply involves exchanging a huge beaming ear-to-ear grin, then putting an arm around each other's shoulders and landing a good-natured thump on the back to indicate their hearty positive feelings and congratulatory appreciation for each other.

Freckle-faced southern tomboy: Ah always loves to help da local farmer-boys wif their chores and play volleyball wif dem, and my fahvorite part is the s. m. c. back-claps dat dey always smilingly gives me throughout the day... makes a gal feel purrty and appreciated!

by QuacksO March 8, 2017

stretching the truth

Refers to the enormous sideways "expanding" of the "honesty line" (i.e., the "straight 'n' narrow" ink-trace that is drawn when the subject is not lying) that occurs whenever Hap Shaughnessy takes a polygraph test while reciting one of his grandiose tales of phenomenal past accomplishments/escapades.

When his fellow villagers disgustedly waved off his amazing tales of howling adventures and intrigue during his trip as an ambassador, Will Rogers indignantly snorted that he hoped that a building would fall in on him if he'd "padded the facts" at all about his recent political adventures, and a huge brick chimney immediately did collapse and shower him with bricks and powdery mortar-dust (he wasn't hurt -- no worries). Kind of a crude and "extreme" polygraph-device, but it did indeed show that Will had evidently been stretching the truth somewhat.

by QuacksO April 16, 2019

Trittium

A rare radioactive gas that, when inhaled, makes someone a super-accomplished singer, just like how Peter Parker's radioactive spider-bite gave him Spider-Man's amazing powers.

John claims to be a great vocalist due to his having breathed Trittium, but In reality he's a moron who can't even sing on-key, so I think that --- if anything --- he may have breathed a healthy dose of "twittium" while he was growing up.

by QuacksO May 6, 2019

warm-waterfall clasp

A "past-heavenly" action --- comparable to a horseshoe-pillow neck-cradle --- to perform wif a hot chick; it involves nestling her against you while you're taking a shower together, and then dreamily holding each other in a loving embrace so dat da heated shower-water soothingly cascades down onto both of you at once.

Marshmallow-hearted stud: I love sharing a warm-waterfall clasp wif Tiffany; da prob is dat --- just like in da cases of a pillow-talk or a horseshoe-pillow neck-cradle --- it's hard for me to stay awake, since her ample warm soft chest-pillowz super-relax me and make me feel drowsy and contented. We therefore wait to do it till we're done bathing and are ready to towel off anyway, so dat we can then just sleepily step outta da shower and head straight to da bedroom, lie down naked, and doze off in each other's arms.

by QuacksO July 14, 2023

Hebrew word-contraction

"Jew" as in, "Did you?"

Hebrew word-contractions can save time when asking follow-up questions, such as, "Jew have a chance to think over my business-proposal yet?" Juts be careful who you say it in front of, though, so as not to offend anyone with affiliation or beliefs in Judaism.

by QuacksO April 10, 2019