Phil Mi Groin's definitions

tcains

An disorganized student with a cuboid head, who often forgets to hand in homework on time or at all. They often uses technical vocabulary, none of which they actually knows the meaning of (e.g. they will talk about quantum physics or astrophysics even though they have no idea what they are talking about). This is a sign of severe lack of common sense and IQ. They also frequently beg for food, despite the fact that they are wealthy enough to go to private school and an infinite number of in and out of school clubs (LAMDA lessons, tuba lessons etc), and due to this they are often extremely late to class, which doesn't really make much of a difference anyway because they spend most of their lessons drooling or staring at the ceiling. On the other hand tcains people can be quite funny and you can have good banter with them.

random guy 1: LOL! That is the 5th time this week that that box head kid forgot to hand in his homework, and it is only Tuesday!

random guy 2: He isn't the sharpest tool in the shed. Once he tried to impress me by talking about quantum physics, but when I asked him what it meant he couldn't provide a coherent answer! It is like the lights are on but no ones home!

random guy 1: what a tcains!

by Phil Mi Groin October 17, 2018

Dragger

A farmer who doesn't care about his GCSE results, often gets drunk out of his mind and drags other peoples results down so far that they may as well have just skived school for their whole academic lives. Despite these shortcomings, overall he is a legend who creates banter in dead lessons, tells you when there is gonna be a lit GAF, and who is just a proper grimey and sik lad.

Ducky: I used to be in set 1 maths, but now i'm in set 2. I used to understand science, but now it is just sheet, sheet, sheet blahhh.

Random guy: Is there any reason why this has happened that you can think of?

Ducky: Yes, I was dragged down

Random guy: Let me guess, was it Will Lucas? He is such a dragger! His family were put on this earth to drag everything down that they come into contact with.

Ducky: yes, but it was worth it. Exams are just bits of paper with scribbles on em. Will has such good banter and it was worth being dragged, even if I have to be a toilet scrubber when I'm older.

by Phil Mi Groin October 6, 2018

Halitosis house

the more scientific term referring to a Breath house, a male with breath which acts like acid on its victims, causing the watering of eyes and the prolonged decay of flesh. Halitosis houses also cause a degree of harm to themselves, which can lead to them decaying from the inside out, leading to even more severe bad breath, which serves to alienate them from the rest of civilized society. The breath smells like raw sewerage mixed with rotting flesh and dog chod.

Guy 1: geez, that guy's breath stinks of rotting zombie flesh
Guy 2: I know, William has had severe Halitosis for several years, due to an overconsumption of flesh and not enough toothpaste and mouth wash!
Guy 3: He is a Halitosis house, but his sister is peng bro, NGL

by Phil Mi Groin November 27, 2018

Breath house

A Guy with smelly breath, much like sewerage, with a hot sister

Guy 1: Gees that guys breath stinks of raw meat!
Guy 2: I know, Williams breath has always stunk for as long as I've known him
Guy 3: But his sister is fit though
Guy 1: Classic example of a Breath house!

by Phil Mi Groin June 19, 2018

Grassiji

Grassijis are ultimate pussys made from the accumulation of all the weakest genetics from history, and they are massive Incels and a probable genetic dead ends. Whilst they are smart and get good exam results, they are constantly rejected by complete munters, and have been known to be rejected by the same girl several times without ever learning their lessons (that girls don't dig em). The 'Grass' part of the term is due to the fact that Grassijis often tell the teachers on others for calling them names or making fun of them online. Grassijis are the natural enemies to {MattNs due to the fact that they are polar opposites. MattN)s are ChadPreets but Grassijis are eternal virgins. MattNs are popular but Grassijis are not. MattNs are hard, but Grassijis are very weak and fragile, and have been known to cry after being slapped, or even something as mild as being called gay. Grassijis are prone to lashing out at random moments, even though they don't have the strength to actually cause pain to the recipient of their outburst. It has been known that Grassijis have attacked people but ended up on the floor within a few seconds of swinging at their opponent, making them look like nobs to their surrounding peers, causing them to be alienated.

Random guy 1: Holy cow, look at that virgin having a tantrum
Random guy 2: It seems that he is on the blob
Random guy 1: Probs, but it could just be that he was rejected. For the 5th time by the same girl!
Random guy 1: Geez, I've seen him get slapped before and he cried lol
Random guy 2: For a 15 year old, he is acting 14 years too young
Grassiji: Stop making fun of me! I'm going to tell the teacher and then go home and play E sports because I am an athlete!
Random guy 1: Oh shut up you Grassiji!

by Phil Mi Groin December 7, 2018

Latcher

Someone not in a group of friends who tries to become one of them by following them around all the time. The group of Friends hate the Latcher but are sometimes too afraid to say it to his face so he continues to latch onto them. It is important to ignore the Latcher, also known as a Leech and hope for him to go away. If you notice a Latcher tagging along then it is easier to ditch him earlier rather than later. The worst Latcher known to man is Adam Barnett.

Tom: Lads lets go and play footie
(Latcher i.e. Adam Barnett follows them to the field)

by Phil Mi Groin May 27, 2018

Cupcake

The act of keffing in one's hand and then putting your hand over someones face, in order to make them smell the keff.

Random guy 1: Damn, what is that smell?

Random guy 2: LOL! you've just been cupcaked!

by Phil Mi Groin October 6, 2018