10 definitions by Percy Dovetonsils III

Defcon

Political pollster's term for defecation constant wherein a percentage of data used in projecting election results based on exit polls is assumed to be shit because voters say one thing to be seen as having voted for the winner but actually voted for their enlightened self-interest.

Fucking Defcon is 87.6%, Mondale is fucked.

by Percy Dovetonsils III July 31, 2003

syphilis

What luetic people are afflicted with.

You are looking mighty luetic today...a nice rosy glow to your skin...is your syphilis no longer in remision?

by Percy Dovetonsils III August 11, 2003

lip

A ration of shit or a verbal hard time.

Don't gimme no lip, you shitweasel.

by Percy Dovetonsils III August 3, 2003

distim

To have disrespected somebody.

Grand Klugle Karl shot Mr Finklestein because he'd distim.

by Percy Dovetonsils III August 4, 2003

gnude

To be gored or mounted by a male gnu. (The former being preferable)

After having been gnude while on a photo safari, Professor Dovetonsils avowed that next time the Nikon was staying home and he was bringing a .460 Weatherby Magnum.

by Percy Dovetonsils III July 26, 2003

mashed potato sandwich

An adjectival description of something as messed up as a soup sandwich.

Drill Sargeant Bohannon looked the recruit in the eye and said, "Boy, you are as fucked up as a mashed potato sandwich and will not survive first contact with the enemy unless you get with the program."

by Percy Dovetonsils III August 20, 2003

elf abuse

Environmental Liberation Front (ELF) "vandalism" that is terrorism.

Elf abuse is perpetrated by Ecothugs.

by Percy Dovetonsils III August 4, 2003