Napoleon BonerPart's definitions

Hoopmeister

A fellow who perhaps “bakes a lighter sponge”

One with a penchant for interfering with the anus of another gent .

See that Tarquin , he’s a proper Hoopmeister, so he is .

by Napoleon BonerPart February 3, 2023

unmitigated buffoonery

Any situation that could conceivably have arisen , where the sheer scale and levels of uttetrly abject stupidity could not have possibly been predicted or indeed legislated for .

This decision is so preposterously overflowing with unmitigated buffoonery that I may have to go and cut out my own brain .

Can you believe the previously unsurpassed level of unmitigated buffoonery that has led to a committee of horrifically incompetent clown shoes re-electing that fucking cretin back into that position ? No wonder fucking lions eat their young

by Napoleon BonerPart March 12, 2023

Shitkickers waltz

The act of sort of ‘shuffling along’ instead of walking properly. Almost as if your shoes are a bit too big for you . Thus resembling someone slightly tamely advancing a relatively solid turd along the sidewalk with their foot or feet . We’ve all seen such half arsed gaits being displayed , mostly by junkies , pissed-up fuckwitts or indeed those individuals that may have in fact , shat in their own clothes .

Dancing the shitkickers waltz

See that lowlife piece of excrement over there , trying to make his way to Lidl , and dancing the shitkickers waltz ?

by Napoleon BonerPart February 17, 2023

sheddery

The knowledge acquired when a gentleman has spent possibly a little too much time in his shed or in the study of the sheds of others . Intimate technical detail has been gleaned in regards to every aspect of a shed and the delights it can afford a chap .

Colin knew his onions regarding garden outbuildings . A little too well in fact .
Colin comes from the darker side of sheddery

by Napoleon BonerPart February 24, 2023

give us a shoogle

Scottish request made usually by an optimistic male , requesting to have a feel of a female’s breasticles

( often , but not always , denied )

Gie’s a shoogle of yer mammary duke-Elliot’s , darlin

Give us a shoogle

by Napoleon BonerPart February 17, 2023

Gary glitter faux pas

The unfortunate act of passing comment on the antics of a child or children , which leads to others in one’s company suspecting you of somewhat inappropriate behaviour towards minors

I can’t wait to get me shoes off and join in with the kiddies on that bouncy castle ….

Oh fuck , I’ve just committed a rather embarrassing Gary Glitter Faux Pas haven’t I .

Sorry everyone , I’ll get my coat

by Napoleon BonerPart February 23, 2023

young pig with its ears pinned back

A method of describing a substantial, yet flaccid male uncircumcised member

he was asleep so I took the chance to have a look at his cock , and holy Christ , it’s like a young pig with its ears pinned back

by Napoleon BonerPart February 3, 2023