Skip to main content

Definitions by Mr. Softey

Fruitastic

Something that is positive and yet gay at the same time.
Gaylord: "Did you hear they legalized gay marriage in California?"
Armande: "Good for them, that's fruitastic!"
Gaylord: "Not to change the subject, but what do you think of the paisley ascot I'm wearing."
Armande: "That too, is fruitastic."
Fruitastic by Mr. Softey January 26, 2009

circus popcorn

An ungodly brick of pink popcorn that is case hardened and sold to the unknowing masses at the circus, carnival, fair, etc.
When I was a kid I used to love circus popcorn, but now it tastes like shit on a stick!
circus popcorn by Mr. Softey January 26, 2009

Butterball Effect 

A scientific theory which explains that regularly eating butter, even a small pat, will eventually turn you into a fat butterball.
At the 10 year High School Reunion.....

Gerard: Hey check out Sylvia, she's a total hefer! She used to be hot, what happened?

Chuck: Dude, It's called the Butterball Effect, all those empty fat calories have wreaked their damnable havoc on her once fine physique.

Gerard: Say what now?
Butterball Effect by Mr. Softey January 25, 2009

cornbread 

Money a prostitute makes from performing anal sex acts, as in getting cornholed.
whore #1: I don't think I can sit down after what that last John did to me!

whore#2: Whatchoo gonna do 'bout it?

whore#1: Child, I'm taking this cornbread and getting me some Tucks.

whore#2: Shee-oot!
cornbread by Mr. Softey January 25, 2009

Peach Rain 

Filling a plastic spoon with the syrup from canned peaches and launching it on the unsuspecting lunchroom.
Mauro: For the love of God! Mystery meat and peaches again!

Heath: Grab your umbrella, because the forecast calls for the extremely unheralded return of the Peach Rain!

Mauro: Say what now?

Heath: Incoming!

Mauro: God, I love the smell of Peach Rain in the morning!

Heath: True dat!

Mauro: Word to my niggas!

Heath: Say What now?
Peach Rain by Mr. Softey January 25, 2009

Beeftown 

A room that is awash with a lingering, beefy aroma that is usually associated with the massive ingestion of meat products and the flatulence produced by them.
"Let's try to stay upwind of Beeftown until the fog clears."

"The mayor of Beeftown shits on a throne of lies."

"Welcome to Beeftown, population: you."

"Mauro and his family are summering in Beeftown and they're having quite a lovely time."
Beeftown by Mr. Softey January 23, 2009

Johnny Redchips 

A card player who has amassed a large collection of, mostly red poker chips. Since reds are the lowest valued chip, it makes you look like you have a lot of money when you really don't.
"Another massive three dollar pot taken down by Johnny Redchips!"

"Can anybody break a five? Johnny Redchips is cashing out."

"You see my dollar and raise me a quarter? Why, that's too rich for my blood, Johnny Redchips!"
Johnny Redchips by Mr. Softey January 23, 2009