MoLincs's definitions

daps

Old fashioned running shoe, plimsol, pump.
Derived from an advertisment for Dunlop Athletic Plimsols' but now a common term for sports shoes and trainers in parts of England and Wales.

Teacher to class: "get your daps on" (hurry up).
Also, 'diahorrea' is shit with daps on....

by MoLincs September 20, 2009

you can take a dog to a tree but you can't make it bend its leg

The application of the expression 'you can take a horse to water, but you can't make it drink' the more familiar domestic dog.
When someone either deliberately or through stupidity refuses to take the obvious decision or follow the necessary course of action.
Can also be "...cock its leg".

A: "I told X to look at the new proceedures before the promotion interview"
B: "yeah, well, you can take a dog to a tree but you can't make it bend its leg".

by MoLincs September 20, 2009

uber-shambles

One of the sequence derived from the term omni-shambles

By abolishing the post room and having everyone put their own mail in separate envelopes the head of office admin proved they were the real uber-shambles everyone suspected all along.

by MoLincs September 12, 2012

Jesus price

An exorbitant price quoted in response to an enquiry, often in bargaining situations in markets etc. where haggling is usual.

An over optimistic price quoted in the hope of snaring an unsuspecting buyer, tourist etc.
Said by the prospective purchaser to indicate that they know roughly what something is worth and are not going to pay over the odds.

Man standing in front of shop selling oriental rugs, shopkeeper approaches:
"How much is that one (pointing to a nice example)...but don't quote me no Jesus price"

by MoLincs August 10, 2009

absolute shambles

The penultimate form of shambles (which could be foreseen by any five year old), caused by the ineptitude of so-called management failing to understand how the job is really done. Sacking all the administrative staff at once will result in an absolute shambles.

The management team thought it was an excellent idea to sack everyone in the administrative grade: "look how much money we will save, aren't we such clever boys and girls!"
The result was of course an absolute shambles because no real work could be done. It was a far bigger shambles than had been created in the past.

by MoLincs November 28, 2011

gay buffer

Elderly male, usually gay or imputedly gay. Elderly male living alone so assumed to be gay by those with no other knowledge of him.

Derived from English slang for elderly male "old buffer"; 'buffer' being an industrial employment in metalworking.

Him? He lives in that house on his own, guess he's a gay buffer.

by MoLincs July 11, 2010

complete shambles

The second tier of organisational shambles caused by management failing to understand even the basics of how an office operates.

Unlike a simple shambles, it could be foreseen by any educated 10 year old.

Sending the member of staff who paid the accounts to work in another office resulted in neither the electricity or water bills being paid, instantly reducing the office to a complete shambles which was far worse than the shambles when only the water bill had been unpaid.

by MoLincs November 28, 2011