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MoLincs's definitions

pushing diarrhoea uphill with a rake

Trying to do the near impossible due to having or being given the wrong tools or insufficiency of time.
Usually preceded by "like pushing...".
The refusal of management to see the blindingly obvious despite it being pointed out and insisting upon something inappropriate.
A:"Can you get this new program to print?".
B:"No, I've told the service centre every day this week but they still say it's ok; dealing with them is like pushing diarrhoea uphill with a rake".
by MoLincs September 20, 2009
mugGet the pushing diarrhoea uphill with a rakemug.

absolute shambles

The penultimate form of shambles (which could be foreseen by any five year old), caused by the ineptitude of so-called management failing to understand how the job is really done. Sacking all the administrative staff at once will result in an absolute shambles.
The management team thought it was an excellent idea to sack everyone in the administrative grade: "look how much money we will save, aren't we such clever boys and girls!"
The result was of course an absolute shambles because no real work could be done. It was a far bigger shambles than had been created in the past.
by MoLincs November 28, 2011
mugGet the absolute shamblesmug.

council house bulge

effect of a bra at lest one size too small causing a bulge over the top of the cup. Either due to someone trying to look like they have more than they have, or being too fat for an old bra.
Having nothing else clean to wear, Waynetta wore her oldest bra, even though it gave her a severe council house bulge.
Chelsea wanted to impress Kevin so she stuffed her bra with padding underneath, she thought it gave her an impressive cleavage but everyone else thought it was just council house bulge.
by MoLincs October 24, 2009
mugGet the council house bulgemug.

green politics

Derived from 'green envy'; a political stance based upon envy of anyone earning more than the commentator regardless of skill or ability. Perception by some that politicians are all freeloaders and worthless so not entitles to a reasonable rate of remuneration.
The 'green' may or may not be a reference to the 'greenback' US $.

Nothing to do with the environment.
Q: So, how is it that Mr.Xyz is worth £65k pa ($100,000)?

He only sits there and votes occasionally.
A: That's just green politics because no one thinks you are worth that much!
by MoLincs July 23, 2010
mugGet the green politicsmug.

prossibly

A mixture of possibly and probably, indicating an uncertain degree of uncertainty.
A; "You going to be on-line tomorrow?"
B: (having no idea one way or the other), "Prossibly".
by MoLincs September 20, 2009
mugGet the prossiblymug.

daps

Old fashioned running shoe, plimsol, pump.
Derived from an advertisment for Dunlop Athletic Plimsols' but now a common term for sports shoes and trainers in parts of England and Wales.
Teacher to class: "get your daps on" (hurry up).
Also, 'diahorrea' is shit with daps on....
by MoLincs September 20, 2009
mugGet the dapsmug.

Jesus price

An exorbitant price quoted in response to an enquiry, often in bargaining situations in markets etc. where haggling is usual.

An over optimistic price quoted in the hope of snaring an unsuspecting buyer, tourist etc.
Said by the prospective purchaser to indicate that they know roughly what something is worth and are not going to pay over the odds.
Man standing in front of shop selling oriental rugs, shopkeeper approaches:
"How much is that one (pointing to a nice example)...but don't quote me no Jesus price"
by MoLincs August 10, 2009
mugGet the Jesus pricemug.

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