Definitions by MaryTodd1818
HPJ
Hyperthermic Bartholin's Secretions (also known as "hot pussy juice")
A condition wherein vaginal secretions rise to a dangerously high temperature as a result of excessive stimulation. Caution should be taken, especially during oral copulation which may result in dermal trauma about the cunnilinguist's chin or midface.
A condition wherein vaginal secretions rise to a dangerously high temperature as a result of excessive stimulation. Caution should be taken, especially during oral copulation which may result in dermal trauma about the cunnilinguist's chin or midface.
Abe was performing oral on me and got me so worked up that I showered him with HPJ and he ended up with burns on his chin worse than those you would get from the ejected contents of a boiling-hot pizza roll.
HPJ by MaryTodd1818 November 4, 2021
HPJ
Hyperthermic Bartholin's Secretions (also known as "hot pussy juice").
A condition wherein vaginal secretions rise to a dangerously high temperature as a result of excessive stimulation. Caution should be taken, especially during oral copulation which may result in dermal trauma about the cunnilinguist's chin or midface.
A condition wherein vaginal secretions rise to a dangerously high temperature as a result of excessive stimulation. Caution should be taken, especially during oral copulation which may result in dermal trauma about the cunnilinguist's chin or midface.
Abe was performing oral on me and got me so worked up that I showered him with HPJ and he ended up with burns on his chin worse than those you would get from the ejected contents of a boiling-hot pizza roll.
HPJ by MaryTodd1818 October 28, 2021
Dragging The Caber
When an exceptionally well-endowed man wears a kilt in the traditional style and ends up dragging the tip of his member through the dirt.
Abe took me to the Highland Games where we both wore traditional Scottish dress. It wasn't until I looked back and saw the trench between his footprints that I realized Abe had been dragging the caber for the last half mile.
Dragging The Caber by MaryTodd1818 April 25, 2021
Splooge Tree
Similar to a family tree, but populated with one’s sexual conquests rather than relatives. It is commonly depicted by a phallus representing the trunk, testicles for the roots, and globs of splooge shot from the tip for the foliage (conquests).
(Also known as a “Spooge Tree” or “Fuck Tree”)
(Also known as a “Spooge Tree” or “Fuck Tree”)
Abe painted a mural of his splooge tree on the wall, and the damn thing looks like an overgrown weeping willow.
Splooge Tree by MaryTodd1818 April 25, 2021
In Flagrante Delicto
A fancy Northwest coffee drink that varies wildly but must contain coffee beans roasted over the smoldering timbers of a log cabin and something “explicitly foamy.”
I ordered an In Flagrante Delicto in Chicago on the first of May, but instead of a delightful mouth full of foam, Abe and I ended up getting arrested.
In Flagrante Delicto by MaryTodd1818 March 16, 2021
pop a boney
Spawn an erection by sheer will through elite control of the bulbospongiosus muscle... often for a utilitarian rather than sexual purpose.
We got stuck in deep snow bank and didn't have a flare, so Abe had to pop a boney and tie a flag to it to signal for help.
pop a boney by MaryTodd1818 February 25, 2021
hot Malört
The bitter post-fellatio aftertaste that comes from a man who's been drinking too much weird liquor.
Abe is so thoughtful... he always brings me pineapple juice to wash it down when he's been doing shots and knows he's about to give me a hot Malört.
hot Malört by MaryTodd1818 February 18, 2021