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Malcolm X-crement's definitions

clod

1. A hardened mass of dirt.
2. A person who would have to learn ettiquette just to elevate himself to the title of hardened mass of dirt.
3. A popular French given name.
It hasn't rained in weeks, look at all those clods!

Some clod sped through the puddle and splashed mud all over my suit!

Clod DeBussy was a good composer!
by Malcolm X-crement December 27, 2003
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Perfect Woman

Creature, much like Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny, Sasquatch and the Good Nigger- often spoken of, but one has never actually been seen by a reputable witness.
I met the perfect woman last night, just before I sailed my yacht back to my mansion.....yeah...that's the ticket!
by Malcolm X-crement January 5, 2004
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Schvatze

A term often used by Jews to describe a person with dark brown skin, huge lips and knappy hair; a Junglebunny.
Oy, Murray! Don't run over those schvatzes!
by Malcolm X-crement November 17, 2003
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The Hersheys

To have a very watery bowel movement that bursts out of ones anus uncontrollably, while making a noise similar to the noise heard when one squeezes a plastic bottle of Hersheys milk chocolate.

The shits; diarrhea.
I had to get up five times last night to walk Muffy, as she had the Hersheys again!
by Malcolm X-crement December 21, 2003
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Wal-mart

1. Place where 90% of my wardrobe comes from.

2. Store where annoying music and LOUD commercials are blared over loudspeakers, in a curteous attempt to drive shoppers from the store in disgust, before they spend too much money.

3.Store that has merchandise of often decent quality at the lowest prices, now- but just until it has driven all competition out of business....then watch the prices rise!

4. Provider of jobs for people who are too stupid and too lazy to be engaged in meaningful employment. (I once encountered a clerk who was unable to deduct ten-percent from a price in her head!)

5. Store where you can buy cooking utensils- then become hungry and walk to McDonalds without going outside, then walk to the pharmacy, for medicine to relieve the diarrhea caused by the McDonalds.
I need to update my wardrobe- to Wal*Mart!
by Malcolm X-crement January 18, 2004
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clodhopper

An extremely clumsey and awkward person.
That clodhopper stepped on my foot!
by Malcolm X-crement December 27, 2003
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Howdy Doody

1. A classic childrens television show from the 1950's featuring Buffalo Bob, a ventriloquist who had, among characters, a wooden puppet named Howdy Doody.

2. What you say to the steaming pile of turds in the toilet, when you turn back to look at them.
"It's Howdy Doody time, boys and girls!

Howdy!, doody!
by Malcolm X-crement December 7, 2003
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