Logical Empiricist Stoic's definitions
CPN (aka Cost Per Nut) is the empirical value that ultimately answers the question, “Which woman is hotter?”
In its simplest form:
CPN = total resources spent (MONEY + TIME + EFFORT) / number of directly induced orgasms (not including fantasized jerk-offs)
MONEY includes meals, gifts, etc. TIME includes the number of dates, phone calls, emails, etc. EFFORT takes into account travel, meeting her friends & family, etc.
Because of the subjective nature of dating and relationships, (ie “I prefer blondes”, “I like big butts”, “I’m a boob man”, etc), CPN condenses to one of the most basic goals of male dating and the relative cost of reaching it.
Note that CPN will vary greatly for the same woman depending on her evaluation of the individual male. While one hears “I don’t do that”, Chads easily bypass her defenses or simply aren’t confronted with such automatic barriers.
CPN is often challenged by the emotional female response “You can’t put a price on love!” This is ostensibly true. However, all too often and late, once-enamored males find themselves on the wanting side of female-biased institutions, such as divorce court, where a judge will tell him, to the penny, how much “love” costs per month.
In practical application, CPN tends to enhance the merit of the Hotness Scale (aka Hot-Crazy Matrix) and helps males focus on their innate logic before being overwhelmed by primal urges and emotions.
In its simplest form:
CPN = total resources spent (MONEY + TIME + EFFORT) / number of directly induced orgasms (not including fantasized jerk-offs)
MONEY includes meals, gifts, etc. TIME includes the number of dates, phone calls, emails, etc. EFFORT takes into account travel, meeting her friends & family, etc.
Because of the subjective nature of dating and relationships, (ie “I prefer blondes”, “I like big butts”, “I’m a boob man”, etc), CPN condenses to one of the most basic goals of male dating and the relative cost of reaching it.
Note that CPN will vary greatly for the same woman depending on her evaluation of the individual male. While one hears “I don’t do that”, Chads easily bypass her defenses or simply aren’t confronted with such automatic barriers.
CPN is often challenged by the emotional female response “You can’t put a price on love!” This is ostensibly true. However, all too often and late, once-enamored males find themselves on the wanting side of female-biased institutions, such as divorce court, where a judge will tell him, to the penny, how much “love” costs per month.
In practical application, CPN tends to enhance the merit of the Hotness Scale (aka Hot-Crazy Matrix) and helps males focus on their innate logic before being overwhelmed by primal urges and emotions.
"Hey Bro! I think they’re both hot & really like me. Which one should I choose?"
"Pull yourself together my man! All that matters is which one has the lowest CPN. Yo!"
"Pull yourself together my man! All that matters is which one has the lowest CPN. Yo!"
by Logical Empiricist Stoic September 3, 2023
Get the CPN mug.by Logical Empiricist Stoic February 18, 2025
Get the Canine Carpaccio mug.A social countermovement and awareness campaign against female entitlement and lack accountability which results in unfounded false accusations towards men.
Man sues 50 women for $2.6 million after they called him a bad date in viral FB group, thus beginning the #SheToo Movement
by Logical Empiricist Stoic April 13, 2024
Get the SheToo Movement mug.Covid Level Alert (CLA), aka Chicken Little Alarm, is an overreaction to a potentially high-risk event with low (realistically no) probability of occurrence.
Such responses are typically based on emotions, thus bypassing the human brain’s logical reasoning centers.
Such responses are typically based on emotions, thus bypassing the human brain’s logical reasoning centers.
by Logical Empiricist Stoic September 10, 2023
Get the CLA mug.Cost per Nut (CPN) is the empirical value that ultimately answers the question, “Which woman is hotter?”
In its simplest form:
CPN = total resources spent (MONEY + TIME + EFFORT) / number of directly induced orgasms (not including fantasized jerk-offs)
MONEY includes meals, gifts, etc. TIME includes the number of dates, phone calls, emails, etc. EFFORT takes into account travel, meeting her friends & family, etc.
Because of the subjective nature of dating and relationships, (ie “I prefer blondes”, “I like big butts”, “I’m a boob man”, etc), CPN condenses to one of the most basic goals of male dating and the relative cost of reaching it.
Note that CPN will vary greatly for the same woman depending on her evaluation of the individual male. While one hears “I don’t do that”, Chads easily bypass her defenses or simply aren’t confronted with such automatic barriers.
CPN is often challenged by the emotional female response “You can’t put a price on love!” This is ostensibly true. However, all too often and late, once-enamored males find themselves on the wanting side of female-biased institutions, such as divorce court, where a judge will tell him, to the penny, how much “love” costs per month.
In practical application, CPN tends to enhance the merit of the Hotness Scale (aka Hot-Crazy Matrix) and helps males focus on their innate logic before being overwhelmed by primal urges and emotions.
In its simplest form:
CPN = total resources spent (MONEY + TIME + EFFORT) / number of directly induced orgasms (not including fantasized jerk-offs)
MONEY includes meals, gifts, etc. TIME includes the number of dates, phone calls, emails, etc. EFFORT takes into account travel, meeting her friends & family, etc.
Because of the subjective nature of dating and relationships, (ie “I prefer blondes”, “I like big butts”, “I’m a boob man”, etc), CPN condenses to one of the most basic goals of male dating and the relative cost of reaching it.
Note that CPN will vary greatly for the same woman depending on her evaluation of the individual male. While one hears “I don’t do that”, Chads easily bypass her defenses or simply aren’t confronted with such automatic barriers.
CPN is often challenged by the emotional female response “You can’t put a price on love!” This is ostensibly true. However, all too often and late, once-enamored males find themselves on the wanting side of female-biased institutions, such as divorce court, where a judge will tell him, to the penny, how much “love” costs per month.
In practical application, CPN tends to enhance the merit of the Hotness Scale (aka Hot-Crazy Matrix) and helps males focus on their innate logic before being overwhelmed by primal urges and emotions.
"Hey Bro! I think they’re both hot & really like me. Which one should I choose?"
"Pull yourself together my man! All that matters is which one has the lowest Cost per Nut (CPN). Yo!"
"Pull yourself together my man! All that matters is which one has the lowest Cost per Nut (CPN). Yo!"
by Logical Empiricist Stoic September 10, 2023
Get the Cost per Nut (CPN) mug.A blatantly obvious spoonerism to describe uninteresting, low-pay, no-skill-required work that is usually of a temporary & unimportant nature.
"I ain't got no skrilla to pay for some reggie. Yo!"
"Just go online and take some Jigger Nobs."
OR:
"I need somebody to sweep up this crap!"
"You'd better find someone else. I don't do Jigger Nobs. Yo!"
"Just go online and take some Jigger Nobs."
OR:
"I need somebody to sweep up this crap!"
"You'd better find someone else. I don't do Jigger Nobs. Yo!"
by Logical Empiricist Stoic September 3, 2023
Get the Jigger Nobs mug.A more politically correct & socially acceptable way of saying, Nappy Headed Ho.
Possibly a career-saving term.
Possibly a career-saving term.
Don Imus might still have a radio show if he wasn’t dead & had simply said:
"Man, those girls are rough. Dem some NH2s."
"Man, those girls are rough. Dem some NH2s."
by Logical Empiricist Stoic June 27, 2023
Get the NH2 mug.