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Definitions by JayszunVanderwerff

Tweetpression 

Tweetpression, sometimes known as Commentosis is the depression that engulfs a person when the object of your affection online comments to the comment after yours, and in doing so neglects to acknowledge your contribution to the thread.
The object of your affection- "I really need to get out of the house tonight!"
A person you hate now- "Yeah, same. I'm gonna go train at the gym."
You- "It's my night off, can I shout you dinner and a movie?"
The object of your affection- "Have a great session at the gym!!!"
Your inner monologue- "Total Tweetpression."

Tweenis Envy 

When tween stars such as Justin Bieber instill within you a range of emotions based on jealousy, caused by a misplaced and egotistical belief on your part that it should be you that is being adored, even though in most cases you are 30+ years old, unattractive, and have no discernible talent of your own.
(40 year old woman on the telephone)- "Did you see that Rebecca Black video? I want HER life...I got some bad tweenis envy!"

X Fracture 

The jarring and painful realisation that most contestants or "stars" of reality TV shows get, when their short-lived fame has completely dissipated, and they have to return to regular work/life.
Person1- "Remember when (insert name here) was on X Factor?"
Person 2- "Now they're working at Sizzler again. They had a major X Fracture."

Avatar Surgery 

On websites such as turntable.fm, where users seek to gain points in order to upgrade their avatars and therefore their level of respect on the site, lower ranked users often experience anxiety related to being seen as uncool or as an inferior member of the community. As a result, they work hard to accumulate as many points as possible, in the shortest amount of time, so they can upgrade to a better avatar. Once they have attained the new status, they instantly revert to feeling anxiety until they can accumulate enough points to move further up the ladder and get avatar surgery again.
I've been stuck on 286 points all day...if I can get 14 more points I can finally get avatar surgery!

Circadian Backflip. 

The circadian rhythm is the cycle that dictates what your body does when: secretions, sleep, awake, temperature fluctuations, etc; but most importantly, when it does those things.

A circadian backflip is something shift workers and people stuck on night shift experience, when they wake after dark, and go to sleep after dawn.
Person 1- "Where's Cornelius lately? I haven't seen him in months!"
Person2- "Me neither. Since he started his new job he's had a full-on Circadian Backflip. He looks just like Bela Lugosi now!"

Epologise 

I'd like to epologise to all of you, as it is impossible for me to be there in person.