Jamie Douglas's definitions
1. An occurance of high hilarity. This may be a phrase, action, put down or accident.
2. A precious stone carved into an amusing shape, like a phallus.
2. A precious stone carved into an amusing shape, like a phallus.
Richie: "Chris you douchebag - I'd try and make fun of you only I don't want to compete with nature!"
Tom: "Ha! That's a comic gem!"
"Look at this funny looking diamond in the shape of a plump rump - it's a comic gem!"
Tom: "Ha! That's a comic gem!"
"Look at this funny looking diamond in the shape of a plump rump - it's a comic gem!"
by Jamie Douglas November 23, 2006
Get the comic gem mug.Contrary to the actual words used, a cry baby neither cries nor is an infant, but is a fully grown adult who whines too much and should know better.
A cry baby will normally complain about the most petty things, like there being no packets of brown sugar on their hotel room tea tray, the fact the train is four minutes late, and being dumped by their significant other.
The only acceptable way to deal with a cry baby is to pretend to physically cry when they start complaining, by rubbing ones eyes and quivering ones bottom lip in a totally OTT manner, followed by the put-down "don't cry about it".
A cry baby will normally complain about the most petty things, like there being no packets of brown sugar on their hotel room tea tray, the fact the train is four minutes late, and being dumped by their significant other.
The only acceptable way to deal with a cry baby is to pretend to physically cry when they start complaining, by rubbing ones eyes and quivering ones bottom lip in a totally OTT manner, followed by the put-down "don't cry about it".
Tubs: "Can you believe it, there's no haddock left down the chippy!"
Edward: "Boo-hoo, don't cry about it, cry baby!"
Edward: "Boo-hoo, don't cry about it, cry baby!"
by Jamie Douglas September 6, 2006
Get the cry baby mug.by Jamie Douglas December 19, 2006
Get the barm mug.Someones who's really vain and makes an unecessary effort with their appearance e.g. a well oiled, beautifully bronzed sunbather at a tourist resort, or a cool kid with too much gel in their hair. The phrase was first used in german (lackierter Affe), and is a lovely description of that loathsome type of person.
by Jamie Douglas September 6, 2006
Get the varnished monkey mug.by Jamie Douglas December 7, 2006
Get the pannces mug.Golfing term. When you've totally topped the ball, but it squirts along the ground and goes a bloody mile because of how hard you hit it, your ball is 'running like a Kenyan on speed'.
This derives from the fact that Kenya has a long history of some of the best long distance runners in the world, and the effect that the drug speed has on people.
This derives from the fact that Kenya has a long history of some of the best long distance runners in the world, and the effect that the drug speed has on people.
by Jamie Douglas September 6, 2006
Get the running like a Kenyan on speed mug.Margret Thatcher, your old headmaster, traffic wardens, nightclub doormen and the Pope are all po faced
by Jamie Douglas December 6, 2006
Get the po faced mug.