Jamie Douglas's definitions
Golfing term. Means "it's up there, but you're not proud".
When one hits a total duffer, but it trickles along the ground and onto the green, one has hit a sister shot.
When one hits a total duffer, but it trickles along the ground and onto the green, one has hit a sister shot.
by Jamie Douglas September 6, 2006
Get the sister shotmug. Blatently obvious. If a fat person tries to sneak round a corner they will be seen, as their belly will protrude first and give them away. Hence if something can be seen a mile off, or is really obvious, it can be 'seen coming like a fat man round the corner'
Phil: 'Hey, did you hear Janice was fired?'
Butch: 'Yeah, I saw that coming like a fat man round the corner!"
Butch: 'Yeah, I saw that coming like a fat man round the corner!"
by Jamie Douglas August 26, 2006
Get the saw that coming like a fat man round the cornermug. Golfing game. When a man fails to drive the ladies tee-box it is customary to force him to turn his trouser/shorts pockets inside out, unzip his fly, and walk the length of the hole with his johnson out, thus making an elephants image around his crotch.
Cruel variations of this game include consuming a quiagh (a small silver tureen used to formally serve whiskey at gatherings) of whiskey before every new hole when playing in a fourball. The first 3 players (determined by the lowest score at the previous hole) can sip as much or as little as they like, but the fourth player must finish what is left. This normally results in at least one player getting totally mashed and spaffing their drives only a handful of yards.
Cruel variations of this game include consuming a quiagh (a small silver tureen used to formally serve whiskey at gatherings) of whiskey before every new hole when playing in a fourball. The first 3 players (determined by the lowest score at the previous hole) can sip as much or as little as they like, but the fourth player must finish what is left. This normally results in at least one player getting totally mashed and spaffing their drives only a handful of yards.
"Ooops, failed to make the ladies tee again, you know what that means - elephant golf!"
"Let's hit the golf course with a bottle of dram for some elephant golf"
"OK, rules for todays golf competition. No ladies on the course, and elephant golf to be played at all times."
"Let's hit the golf course with a bottle of dram for some elephant golf"
"OK, rules for todays golf competition. No ladies on the course, and elephant golf to be played at all times."
by Jamie Douglas September 8, 2006
Get the elephant golfmug. A period of time when the sheer volume and quality of live sport induces a feeling not dissimilar to an orgasm in you.
It usually involves a lot of beer.
It usually involves a lot of beer.
OMG - the Premiership and Championship football is reaching it's climax, there's Champions League footie, the Hong Kong Sevens rugby is on, we're in the middle of the cricket world cup, we're close to the world championship snooker, the Masters golf at Augusta is next weekend with F1 motor racing and the tennis summer season is about to kick in - it's a sportsgasm!
A weekend with more than 3 different types of live sport to watch can be called a sportsgasm.
A weekend with more than 3 different types of live sport to watch can be called a sportsgasm.
by Jamie Douglas April 8, 2007
Get the sportsgasmmug. by Jamie Douglas January 21, 2007
Get the mighty weaponmug. Really really really sweaty. Imagine a chubby fellow dining out at his local pastry shop - he stands, salivating, over the counter wondering which fatty treat to shove down his gullet, and then indecision strikes and he sweats over what to order. That's how sweaty you are if you're sweating like a fat man in a cake shop.
Incidently, if you are a fat person and want a way to avoid such problems as choosing which cake, my advice is to simply buy everything. Problem solved
Incidently, if you are a fat person and want a way to avoid such problems as choosing which cake, my advice is to simply buy everything. Problem solved
Kirsty: 'How was your squash game?'
Jim: 'Great, but now I'm sweating like a fat man in a cake shop.'
Jim: 'Great, but now I'm sweating like a fat man in a cake shop.'
by Jamie Douglas August 26, 2006
Get the sweating like a fat man in a cake shopmug. Someones who's really vain and makes an unecessary effort with their appearance e.g. a well oiled, beautifully bronzed sunbather at a tourist resort, or a cool kid with too much gel in their hair. The phrase was first used in german (lackierter Affe), and is a lovely description of that loathsome type of person.
by Jamie Douglas September 6, 2006
Get the varnished monkeymug.