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Jack Spank9049's definitions

Jacob

The happiest guy on Earth...
Me: "Hello Jacob, you seem happy today*

*Jacob in a disgruntled voice*: "I'm always happy!"

(Jacob uses a disgruntled face and voice to fool people into thinking he's not happy when he actually is...)
by Jack Spank9049 July 15, 2024
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Boss man shop

A small shop usually run by an Indian or Pakistani family that sells everyday household essentials such as: Toilet rolls, drinks, some freezer food, Elf Bars, diabetes and kitchen cupboard snacks.

Sometimes, these shops may be located on their own in a housing estate
Spack No.1: Where are you going?

Gonna go to Boss man shop across the field, be back in 20
by Jack Spank9049 September 26, 2022
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F#cking Cheating F#cking Wanker!

What a cheater in Warzone is called and also the #1 thing I say over death chat when I'm thirsty for some attention...
*Gets killed by someone in Warzone* Me over death chat: F#cking Cheating F#cking Wanker!
by Jack Spank9049 June 3, 2021
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Morning routine

The act of getting up first thing in the morning and heading straight to the spankroom to have a violent shit
Person No.1: I need to brush my teeth as I have to leave very soon!

Person No.2: I think Jake is in there having his morning routine!
by Jack Spank9049 February 4, 2023
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Smoothwall

The page I get greeted with 50% of the time when browsing the interwebz on the school network.
Imma go on r/memes on Reddit! *Searches up and proceeds to click on Reddit*. "Smoothwall - Site blocked, this request has been logged blah blah blah.
by Jack Spank9049 May 5, 2021
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Urban Dictionary time!

Said by Spack No.2 when he see or hears a slang word he is yet to understand
*Sees a post on the internet about someone getting off "the zaza"

Spack No.2: "Right, Urban Dictionary time!
by Jack Spank9049 January 14, 2023
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Dole money

Benefits, Universal Credit, Job-seeker's allowance, Personal Independence Payment (PIP) and so on...
Friend: Want to do something today?

Me: I can't as I am working to pay your dole money!
by Jack Spank9049 March 8, 2025
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