Definitions by Hym Iam

License 

Oh hey yeah Mikey was telling me about that. That's crazy! What's funny is that what you said is exactly how I described what's happening to me. You do that a lot. Intentionally. Seemingly intentionally. I mean, 'a tweet for help?' Come on now. I mean, you know back in 2018 (I started in 2017 btw) I was in the sex cult but I was fan. Really. We didn't have a problem until the Andy Ngo episode of the Jordan B. Peterson podcast. Where you and your father started doing the thing that you're doing here.

Hym "Wow honey, you sound crazy saying that shit. 'The government has infiltrated the colleges!' People are going to think you're nuts. I wouldn't have posted that if I was you. And, you know, I was telling Mike something about this license earlier. I says to him, I says: 'You know, it's ironic that they're coming for him because he said (about the activist-types) they need to be careful what they say because someone they are talking about may be on a board that determines whether or not you get a grant or keep your license.' And I thought that was funny because that is the opposite of meritocracy. That's literally just equity without the racial element. See, I hope that trying to hoist me by my own petard isn't having any real world consequences for you... You know? Cus you would look pretty fucking stupid if you tried to impose my own personal hell on me and then got caught doing it...

Right? Because he's the book God's one true prophet and all... It would make him look pretty bad. And not me 'Hym' but 'him' him... Especially if I am autistic... That would be even worse for you, right? Hilarious. Nobody made you do any of this (by the way). You could have done the right thing at any time. I mean, if this is how you act when you believe an omniscient reality monster is watching, I'd hate to see you when no one is watching... But, hey, I'm here if you need anything. A place to stay. A sneaky link (your husband has to pretend I don't exist so it doesn't count as cheating 😘). Anything. You know how the old saying goes 'A daughter of my eternal rival is a daughter of mine' Which... ew, kind of makes my solicitation gross... ugh, yeah, you know what? That's off the table. We just... Yeah, no... It just wouldn't feel right at this point but, hey, anything other than sex and I'm there, kay? That license shit is crazy though. Alright. Talk to you later luv ya buhbye 👋"

License by Hym Iam January 7, 2023

Big fat girthy brain 

Why should anyone listen to me? Well, it's that long hard monster brain of mine. That's reason enough. Isn't it?

Hym "Don't you know? Can't you tell!? The size of things dictates our behavior round here. See, the fact that I got this big fat girthy brain means that all the academics should be just a-clamoring to listen to me. And they're right to do it too cus if you're going to listen to anybody it should be somone with a big ole brain."

Big fat girthy brain by Hym Iam January 7, 2023

Backdrop 

Yup... That's hot. I dig it. Showing a little waistline. Yeah. Which begs the question: How did that one sports illustrated photographer get his job? Sure as hell wasn't some kind of competence hierarchy...

Hym "The backdrop is hot. 👍 I dig it."

Backdrop by Hym Iam January 7, 2023

Known 

Hey... You want to hear a joke?

Hym "Hey... You want to hear a joke?"

Iam "Um, yeah. Sure."

Hym "Bet you don't want to be known for that... *snickers* Get it? Bet you don't want to be known for that."

Iam "HA! Heheheheh that's pretty good. I get it. Hehehehehehe"

Known by Hym Iam January 5, 2023

The Great Pyramids

Here's a theory for you: The Great Pyramids. What if they didn't build them up? What if they dug them down?

Iam "Like, if there were these larger limestone landforms in the desert (not plateaus but the other things) and they just chiseled their way down. Carved out blocks and polished it on the way down. Dug out the tombs. That would answer the question "how did they move those giant blocks!?" They didn't. They chiseled it out like a statue. Used a giant metal wire to saw them into blocks. More plausible than aliens. And you could ask 'well, why don't we see these other giant limestone land masses?' I don't know. Do limestone landmasses crumble over time? Buy yeah, there you go. There's my 'how the great pyramids were made theory'." 🤷 ♂️

The Great Pyramids by Hym Iam January 5, 2023

The Culture War 

2 groups of assholes using their desire to curate their children's reality to justify imposing thier self-embodied perfection/universal submission ethic on the world.

Hym "Like that scene from the anime about me where the goblins tie a bunch of women to carts and use them as arrow shields... The Culture War is little more than that, but with children. 'Stop shooting arrows at my fuck trophies!' 'NO! YOU stop shooting arrows at MY fuck trophies!' Like... Your kids existing... doesn't mean I have to do (or not do) anything. Seriously. I can't do what I want because your wife didn't fuck me? No. That's not how that works. You not liking the reality you've chosen subject your children to is justification for you controlling me. Now... You're going to try to refute this using historical precedent. That's not a good argument. But it's ok. I have the solution. If you want me to do or not-do a thing. Your wife can suck my dick. She can suck my dick and I will (then) consider doing or not doing the thing. But that's reality. Plenty of children have been subjected to far worse (historically). That's the reality you exist in. I know. It sucks. The bright side is that it's temporary. So.... Enjoy that I guess..."

The Culture War by Hym Iam January 3, 2023

Rhaenyra

I know it's late but... NOOOOO!!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!?!?!? RAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!

*Clanking and banging in the background*
Hym "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!"
*Clanking and banging continues*
Iam "............."

Hym "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!"

*Loud bang*
Iam "HEY! That almost hit me..."

Hym "RHAENYRA NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!"

Iam *sigh* "He liked the other one... "😒

Hym "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!"
*Clanking and banging resumes*

Rhaenyra by Hym Iam January 3, 2023