Handcuffmonkfish's definitions

Love 💕 shove

A single thrust of a penis in a vagina during sexual intercourse. Countable noun.

"She kept talking during the movie and people in the theater were complaining so I threw her over the seat and gave her a good, long Love 💕 shove..."

by Handcuffmonkfish November 29, 2020

freedom of speech

freedom of speech
just another phrase for the inalienable right to make an ass out of yourself by shouting out krapchat and or whispering bittersweet nothings of zero economic value , for people who can't sing

You might as well be Bobby McGee my mooddudebro, I got freedom of speech, you can sing your shit at me like I'm drivin' the train.

by Handcuffmonkfish October 18, 2019

fucking Hopeless

fucking Hopeless - when you've been going out with a girl named Hope and she starts cutting you off below the waist, then your best friend tells you that she found a guy with a bigger dick, a nicer car, more money and who eats her out until she comes three or four times before he even thinks about asking for a blowjob, you realize you are fucking Hopeless.

"I called her grandmother up on her landline and she said the little slut ain't home, she's probably out fucking that good looking guy with a nice car lots of money and all those sores on his tongue, I guess you're fucking Hopeless. Too bad, I liked you. Want to come over and pump a hot load in my ass for sympathy? Bring a pack of camels and pint of gin if you do."

by Handcuffmonkfish November 30, 2020

fugment

Fugment NOUN

a fictional memory in one's personal sexual history

"I thought I had fucked her the night we'd met but it was just a fugment of my imagination."

by Handcuffmonkfish December 13, 2020

NSWF

NSWF is an acronym for

"Nice shoes, wanna fuck?"

Okay. I'll type slowly here. You're stuck for an icebreaker, so you say to a good looking woman,

"Nswf." Which is code for "NICE SHOES. WANNA FUCK?" and if she doesn't know what it means, it won't get you slapped in the face and you can move on to the next woman. If she does know what it means, you at least know that you might have a chance here.

by Handcuffmonkfish March 13, 2021

Regretsthedaywemet

An apology that lays blame at first possible cause.

It's clearly and entirely all my fault. Please accept my deepest regretsthedaywemet. I should have understood immediately how hopeless it would be to expect you to understand anything other than basic involuntary bodily functions.

by Handcuffmonkfish July 21, 2019

EBR

"EBR", an acronym used to express one's musical tastes, the initials suggesting "Everything But Rap."

My music I guess is like Rock, Jazz, Country, Blues, whatever, you know, EBR.

by Handcuffmonkfish August 30, 2019