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Handcuffmonkfish's definitions

edjumacation

edjumacation - a learning discipline employed by ugly heterosexual high school gym teachers who tutor after school sexually repressed students who are late comers to puberty and EDGE them slowly with unlubricated foot jobs over the course of a school year to their first explosive orgasm, a coming of age ceremony generally witnessed by the entire class that takes place from the foul line of the basketball court with the intention of hitting five to seven shots in a row that would be total swishes except the first one would clog the net totally until it flows over the edge of the rim, to be licked up by the night janitor.
"I don't care if I don't play football and get to go to the prom with my steroid shriveled testicles, I'm getting a good edjumacation."
by Handcuffmonkfish November 30, 2020
mugGet the edjumacationmug.

Fartcap

Fartcap, cheeky noun, political

Bipartisan, Uni-sex, peaceful alternative to a Pussyhat or MAGAhat, allows men to tip hats at ladies in chivalry as opposed to telling them to blow it out their ass, while also permitting women to avoid the embarrassment of a public pussy fart.
They're total political opposites, they hate each other, they won't even look at each other when they fuck, but they're the happiest couple I've ever seen in my life. You can leave your Fartcap on.
by Handcuffmonkfish October 22, 2019
mugGet the Fartcapmug.

Uckish

Uckish
The compound conjunction resolution of uck and ish, uck being the mundane world's solution to human misery through (f)ucking, and the ish replacement the epiphany, we're fishing at last... often the uck is mistakenly uttered by nervous men who are just afraid to tell a woman what he really wants from her, and what it is she really wants to hear...
I'm feeling uckish... Wanna go fishing?
I'm feeling uckish... Wanna go fishing?
by Handcuffmonkfish August 29, 2019
mugGet the Uckishmug.

EBR

"EBR", an acronym used to express one's musical tastes, the initials suggesting "Everything But Rap."
My music I guess is like Rock, Jazz, Country, Blues, whatever, you know, EBR.
by Handcuffmonkfish August 30, 2019
mugGet the EBRmug.

NSWF

NSWF is an acronym for

"Nice shoes, wanna fuck?"
Okay. I'll type slowly here. You're stuck for an icebreaker, so you say to a good looking woman,

"Nswf." Which is code for "NICE SHOES. WANNA FUCK?" and if she doesn't know what it means, it won't get you slapped in the face and you can move on to the next woman. If she does know what it means, you at least know that you might have a chance here.
by Handcuffmonkfish March 13, 2021
mugGet the NSWFmug.

Regretsthedaywemet

An apology that lays blame at first possible cause.
It's clearly and entirely all my fault. Please accept my deepest regretsthedaywemet. I should have understood immediately how hopeless it would be to expect you to understand anything other than basic involuntary bodily functions.
by Handcuffmonkfish July 21, 2019
mugGet the Regretsthedaywemetmug.

STFU

Stfu
See through fucking underwear.
What people always talking about how big or tight their crotch musculature is should wear.
"If your dick is the size you say why aren't you a STFU model?"
by Handcuffmonkfish December 24, 2019
mugGet the STFUmug.

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