water candy

Small ice cubes that you give your kids from your drink at a restaurant or McDonald's or wherever to keep them quiet and happy.
Dad: "Hey, kids, want some water candy?"
Kids: "Yeah!"
Dad: "OK, but now be quiet while I eat my steak." (thinking to himself, "Silly little munchkins.")
by GarthF February 08, 2006
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laughing

Used to describe how you feel inside when you find yourself in a pleasing set of circumstances, or at least in comparison to a worse outcome that also might have occurred. It does not suggest glee at another's misfortunes but rather highlights one's own fortunate situation.
eg. 1: The forecast predicted rain for our camping trip, but the weather turned out to be so gorgeous we were laughing.

eg. 2: While waiting at emergency, I was upset over my ankle injury. But then when I saw the paramedics bring in a 7-year-old girl covered all over with first-degree burns, I realized I should be laughing.
by GarthF December 29, 2005
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gramps champ

The overly slow and cautious driver, usually elderly but not necessarily, who manages to stay in front of you in traffic. They turn where you want to turn, exit where you want to exit, and go into the same parking lot you're heading for, and so they are always in the lead. You have trouble passing them because there's only one lane or else traffic volume is just too busy. So much to your frustration, you remain in second place while they undeservingly take the checkered flag!
Jack: "How come you're so late? The movie's about to start!"

Danny: "I was rushing, but I got stuck behind two or three gramps champs on the way here! It was so annoying!"
by GarthF March 07, 2006
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clap abortion

The attempt to clap in applause at some event but very few people, if any, follow your lead. This can also apply to the related scenario when one tries to lead out in a clapping rhythm at some musical event or figure skating competition but also fails to gain a following.
"After my last clap abortion at the downtown rally, I've decided to call it quits. It's just too embarrassing."
by GarthF February 08, 2006
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dumtard

A combination of "dumb" and "retard". Very similar to "tard" and "f***tard" commonly in use today. The beauty of this term, however, is that it avoids slandering those who are truly mentally retarded and doesn't come across as being overly vulgar and offensive. Best used when someone has shown a momentary lack of intelligence and reasoning in offending you in some way.
Bob: "That guy just cut me off AND he's driving slower than me! Man, some people!"
Larry: "What a f***tard!"
Bob: "Well, maybe so if he did it on purpose. For now, I just think the guy's a dumtard."
Larry: "Suit yourself."
by GarthF December 16, 2005
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sidetalk

Quiet conversation that takes place between people who are sitting beside each other during some kind of committee meeting or official gathering. When enough goes on, and as sound grows exponentially, it can be loud enough to distract the chairperson or whoever is speaking, as well as annoy those who want to carry the meeting's agenda forward.
During the meeting, the mayor became so frustrated with all the sidetalk going on between the city councillors, she finally yelled, "Can you all pay attention to what I'm saying for just a second?!?"
by GarthF December 16, 2005
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loosey goosey

Not following prescribed guidelines or general societal expectations. Very casual. Bypassing certain boundaries.
Jack always comes to work late. I guess both he and the boss are loosey goosey when it comes to punctuality.
by GarthF December 01, 2005
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