siderodromophobia

Morbid fear of train travel.

John's got siderodromophobia. When he goes across country he flies, drives or takes the bus.

by Fearman January 04, 2008

Axis of Literary Evil

Grouping of authors regarded as dark and depraved and explicitly or implicitly worthy of a painful execution because they refused to write books as clean and wholesome as the Bible or Koran. Well, that's what the True Believers would have us think, anyway. At last count included Salman Rushdie, Jo Rowling and Philip Pullman. May be abbreviated to ALE, or AxLE.

Like any true servant of democracy, I find time to support the Axis of Literary Evil whenever I can.

by Fearman January 25, 2008

not quite Chippewa

Something that is not quite Chippewa is something unwanted in a particular, typically coercive, social setting. Something that is not politically correct and therefore stamped on by any means necessary, typically by someone who selflessly has taken it upon themselves to decide what's best for everyone else, and smiles as they do it. From a line spoken by Camp Chippewa director (Peter MacNicol) in the 1993 movie "Addams Family Values".

Why do I get the feeling there's something not quite right here? Something ... not quite Chippewa?

by Fearman March 12, 2008

fudge packer

The person working in the chocolate factory between the chocolate pourer and the paper twister.

If the fudge packers are underpaid, they go on strike and the fudge sweets are all chocolate.

by Fearman November 22, 2007

couch gag

The joke towards the end of the opening credits to The Simpsons. Each week (or most weeks) something different happens when the family rush into the living room to watch the TV.

Various examples of the Couch Gag: the couch turns into a monster that swallows the family once they sit on it ... the end wall with the couch retreats down an increasingly long tunnel and they keep chasing after it ... Santa's Little Helper (their dog) is already sitting on the couch and snarls, hair bristling, as they close in ... the family crash into each other and break into little pieces on the floor with a noise like shattering porcelain.

by Fearman August 14, 2007

Tom Cruise

I'm in love (yippee!!!) and I hate psychiatrists (fucking nut jobs, all of them, ALL OF THEM), who are out to control the world (trembles for a few moments) and drop hydrogen bombs on everybody (BIG ones, yeahhh). Hey, have you seen my girlfriend? (BOINNNGGG!!) I'm wild! You're cool, too! (Pulls hair out, laughs.) No, seriously? Oh. (Grows sullen.) Oh. (Grows REALLY sullen.) Oh. Why would you want to do that to me? No, seriously, why would you want to do that to me? Why? Why? Why would you want to do that to me? (Jumps up on couch, pulls dramatic stance, couch falls backward, he crawls up to kneel on the front of the seat.) They've hated me ever since I played a veteran of the Great Galactic War between the Thetans and the Engrammatised Ones. (Goes boggle-eyed, cackles, shrieks ...,) We're all going to be bigger than Oprah! (YAY!) And it makes me sick, you know that? Why isn't everyone looking at me RIGHT NOW? And you know what? I'm NOT GAY!!! Mimi! Ha! Nicole! Ha! Penelope! Ha! Katie, aww, KATIIEEE!!! Ha-haaaaaaaaaaaa! Here, I can lick my own balls, seriously. Just watch me ... (Licks own balls, audience stampede out of the auditorium.)

The above was a party political broadcast on behalf of Tom Cruise.

by Fearman April 16, 2008

dezz rezz

A really drop-dead gorgeous place to live. A waaaay cool house or flat. A contraction of desirable residence.

Mark has a dezz rezz out by Killiney Beach.

by Fearman October 05, 2007