its an abdominal exercise created and done by Ben Cranston. Done by standing someone on your chest and then doing a situp so they crunch against you.
Ben: Boy, this Cranston Crunch is a real ab killer!
Opal: What's a Cranston Crunch? I've never tried that.
Ben: You're gonna love it. Stand on my belly, I'll show you what it is.
Patty: Easy, dad, she might fall off.
Ben: (Laughing) Who cares?! Its a real gut buster.
Opal: What's a Cranston Crunch? I've never tried that.
Ben: You're gonna love it. Stand on my belly, I'll show you what it is.
Patty: Easy, dad, she might fall off.
Ben: (Laughing) Who cares?! Its a real gut buster.
by Dusty's Baby Powder November 01, 2010
A massage given by Flo Rogers to her best friend and fellow military granny, Beatrice Middleton. A Rogers Rub is most often given before a card game or any other hard time. Rogers Rub is guaranteed to melt stress away. Not a believer yet? Ask Flo Rogers to give you one one time. You will love it! Flo Rogers guaranteed! S.W.A.A.
Flo: Oh no, I'm so stiff. They don't call it Body Poker for nothing. My whole body hurts. I need my Rogers Rub.
Beatrice: (she is putting the cards back) A Rogers Rub? Give me one too! You know I like them. Let's use the Martian Mud.
Flo: Sure, full body or just half?
Beatrice: Well, you know it works best if you go full body with it. A Gunny Granny can't take stress. Hey, its a dirty job, but a Gunny Granny's gotta do what a Gunny Granny's gotta do!
Flo: Hey, I know the feeling. I love a massage, too. And the Rogers Rub is one of the best ways. It sure does melt your body! (Flo and Beatrice start massaging each other)
Beatrice: Oh yeah, this is just flying away. That Body Poker game really took a lot out of me.
Flo: Yeah, it did me too. But, see, a Rogers Rub is a great massage! And it isn't just a massage, we can stretch while we're doing it. (she starts stretching on Flo's ankle)
Flo: (reaches up and kisses Beatrice) Yes, the Rogers Rub - one of the best Sea Granny secrets! A Sea Granny cannot set sail without a Rogers Rub. So creamy!
Beatrice: (she is putting the cards back) A Rogers Rub? Give me one too! You know I like them. Let's use the Martian Mud.
Flo: Sure, full body or just half?
Beatrice: Well, you know it works best if you go full body with it. A Gunny Granny can't take stress. Hey, its a dirty job, but a Gunny Granny's gotta do what a Gunny Granny's gotta do!
Flo: Hey, I know the feeling. I love a massage, too. And the Rogers Rub is one of the best ways. It sure does melt your body! (Flo and Beatrice start massaging each other)
Beatrice: Oh yeah, this is just flying away. That Body Poker game really took a lot out of me.
Flo: Yeah, it did me too. But, see, a Rogers Rub is a great massage! And it isn't just a massage, we can stretch while we're doing it. (she starts stretching on Flo's ankle)
Flo: (reaches up and kisses Beatrice) Yes, the Rogers Rub - one of the best Sea Granny secrets! A Sea Granny cannot set sail without a Rogers Rub. So creamy!
by Dusty's Baby Powder September 25, 2011
A form of fried chicken created by Beatrice Middleton. Done by marinating the chicken in blueberry juice, thus imparting a blue color and sweet flavor. It is often eaten before Duke games to get into the mood to win. It was named after Duke basketball coach Mike "Coach K" Krzyzewski. Beatrice just happens to be friends with him being an alumnus of Duke herself.
Beatrice: Hey honey, are you hungry? I'm fixing you some Coach K Chicken. This is devilishly delicious!
Bryant: How do you make it? It looks like it tastes good.
Beatrice: You marinate the chicken in blueberry juice. It makes it sweet. Turns it a really pretty shade of blue, too. (screaming) GO BLUE DEVILS!
Coach K: Well if it isn't Beatrice Middleton herself. I hear you're making my chicken. I'm pretty hungry. The boys just had a big game. We smashed NC State good!
Beatrice: Okay, its almost done. (fries the chicken) Here, try this. See what you think of it.
(Coach K and Bryant try the chicken)
Bryant: Wow! This blueberry juice really pops. Its like a blueberry in my mouth.
Coach K: Good one, Beatrice! I haven't had this in a long time. I'm gonna have to teach the guys how to make this.
Beatrice: Well, if Coach K likes it, everyone will! This Gunny Granny sure can cook! Hey, there's a Duke game on. Let's take it in the living room, boys. This is going to be sweet. This is one kickin' chicken!
Bryant: How do you make it? It looks like it tastes good.
Beatrice: You marinate the chicken in blueberry juice. It makes it sweet. Turns it a really pretty shade of blue, too. (screaming) GO BLUE DEVILS!
Coach K: Well if it isn't Beatrice Middleton herself. I hear you're making my chicken. I'm pretty hungry. The boys just had a big game. We smashed NC State good!
Beatrice: Okay, its almost done. (fries the chicken) Here, try this. See what you think of it.
(Coach K and Bryant try the chicken)
Bryant: Wow! This blueberry juice really pops. Its like a blueberry in my mouth.
Coach K: Good one, Beatrice! I haven't had this in a long time. I'm gonna have to teach the guys how to make this.
Beatrice: Well, if Coach K likes it, everyone will! This Gunny Granny sure can cook! Hey, there's a Duke game on. Let's take it in the living room, boys. This is going to be sweet. This is one kickin' chicken!
by Dusty's Baby Powder August 15, 2011
A very painful form of arthritis suffered by Ralph Drabble, especially after working in the yard. The condition is so painful that sometimes he can hardly stand up. It is often accompanied by him talking to his body, saying things such as "Come on, left knee!" or "Keep going lower back!" The best known cure is the Drabble Stand, the exercise with which he ends his yard chores.
Ralph: Oh no, not Ralphritis! I'm gonna have to do a Drabble Stand, big time. Come on, left knee! You can do this! Easy, easy now.
LeRoy: What is that? What's with the groaning? Why are you cheering on your body like that? I don't do that.
Ralph: (he massaging his knees because he was kneeling on the ground) Its my Ralphritis. Its this disease I have. Terrible stuff.
LeRoy: I've got almost the same thing. My knees hurt when I run. Or when I've been working out too much. (he bends down and touches his toes) See, I know just what you're talking about. It is terrible.
Ralph: Yeah, we're in the same boat. We both have arthritis. But at least we know how to stretch it off. Its not easy with Ralphritis, though.
LeRoy: How do you do it? I want to know.
Ralph: A Drabble Stand. Here, I'll show you how. (He shows LeRoy how) You ease up out of the kneel. You don't just go all at once. That way you'll get a good stretch. See? Its easy. (both speaking together) Here's to Ralphritis! A yard warrior's best friend!
LeRoy: What is that? What's with the groaning? Why are you cheering on your body like that? I don't do that.
Ralph: (he massaging his knees because he was kneeling on the ground) Its my Ralphritis. Its this disease I have. Terrible stuff.
LeRoy: I've got almost the same thing. My knees hurt when I run. Or when I've been working out too much. (he bends down and touches his toes) See, I know just what you're talking about. It is terrible.
Ralph: Yeah, we're in the same boat. We both have arthritis. But at least we know how to stretch it off. Its not easy with Ralphritis, though.
LeRoy: How do you do it? I want to know.
Ralph: A Drabble Stand. Here, I'll show you how. (He shows LeRoy how) You ease up out of the kneel. You don't just go all at once. That way you'll get a good stretch. See? Its easy. (both speaking together) Here's to Ralphritis! A yard warrior's best friend!
by Dusty's Baby Powder August 14, 2011
A dance done at Camp Swampy by Major Randy "Birdie" Burk. Mostly done after a winning golf game. He will stamp his feet into the dirt, peck at the ground like a chicken, and wave his hands in the air. Similar to the Dirty Bird fan move. So if you want to stay out until about 12:30 play golf with Birdie Burk and learn the Dirty Birdie!
Birdie: Yes, I beat you good, Halftrack! (jumps up and down in excitement) Dirty Birdie, take that! (starts doing the Dirty Birdie)
Amos: Yeah, you beat me all right. What's this dance you're doing? Is that the Dirty Bird? (he starts following what Birdie's doing)
Birdie: No. Its not the Dirty Bird, its the Dirty Birdie. Its a dance that I do every time I win a golf game. You stamp your feet, peck like a chicken, and then do the Dirty Bird. Beetle Bailey fans will love it.
Amos: Sweet! This is a great new dance. When we get back I'm going to show it to Marty. We'll be doing the Dirty Birdie all the way down.
Birdie: Oh yes! The Dirty Birdie rules! Its a sweet move. It doesn't hurty when you do the Dirty Birdie!
Amos: Sweet! (they high five each other and stamp their feet)
Amos: Yeah, you beat me all right. What's this dance you're doing? Is that the Dirty Bird? (he starts following what Birdie's doing)
Birdie: No. Its not the Dirty Bird, its the Dirty Birdie. Its a dance that I do every time I win a golf game. You stamp your feet, peck like a chicken, and then do the Dirty Bird. Beetle Bailey fans will love it.
Amos: Sweet! This is a great new dance. When we get back I'm going to show it to Marty. We'll be doing the Dirty Birdie all the way down.
Birdie: Oh yes! The Dirty Birdie rules! Its a sweet move. It doesn't hurty when you do the Dirty Birdie!
Amos: Sweet! (they high five each other and stamp their feet)
by Dusty's Baby Powder October 29, 2011
A feeling of what life would be like without one's wife, in this case personified by Opal Crankshaft, first used by Earl Pickles.
Earl: You know, Ed, I feel kind of Opal-Less.
Ed: What do you mean?
Earl: Well, that was my wife. Since you married her I miss her.
Ed: Well, without her I'd be Opal-Less myself.
Earl: Ed, I hope you never have to find out.
Ed: What do you mean?
Earl: Well, that was my wife. Since you married her I miss her.
Ed: Well, without her I'd be Opal-Less myself.
Earl: Ed, I hope you never have to find out.
by Dusty's Baby Powder September 15, 2010
It's a bear that patrols malls, often catching bad shoppers and putting them in mall jails. One of many mall cop animals.
Ralph: It's been a rough day. The mall grizzly out here is really crazy.
Emily: Do you think we can trap them? We need some honey.
Ralph: No, mall grizzlies don't eat honey, they eat money!!
Emily: Do you think we can trap them? We need some honey.
Ralph: No, mall grizzlies don't eat honey, they eat money!!
by Dusty's Baby Powder October 09, 2010