Nose hose

Noun: Not actually a real thing, but it appears to be located in the sinus cavities of toddlers and constantly blows out mucus at varying speeds.

When he was little, Shep’s nose hoses would always range from slow drip to geyser.

by Dorkmuffin April 29, 2019

22-wheeler

Noun: A blockage created by a “careful driver” attempting to pass a tractor-trailer; upon reaching the back of the trailer, the car slows to 1 mph faster than the truck and takes 3 or 4 miles to pass before resuming normal speed.

Shep really had to use the bathroom and almost didn’t make it to the rest stop in time because some grandpa created a 22-wheeler right in front of him.

by Dorkmuffin May 04, 2019

Old Yeller

A sports dad who is never happy with the performance of the officials, the other team, his own coach, or his own kid, and makes sure everyone around him knows it.

Is it wrong to wish that Old Yeller behind us would meet the same fate as the dog in the book?

by Dorkmuffin May 02, 2019

Lane violation

Noun: When someone parks their shopping cart on one side of a grocery store lane and stands on the opposite side to look for an item, completely blocking traffic in both directions.

Shep was unable to get to the sardines because some lady committed a lane violation.

by Dorkmuffin May 02, 2019

Hambooger

The result of someone blowing snot all over a burger, whether by accident or on purpose.

Shep’s allergies hit him while he was grilling out, so he wound up serving juicy delicious hamboogers to everyone at the picnic.

by Dorkmuffin April 29, 2019

Growhawk

The thin strip of grass that the yard guy missed when he mowed.

At first I was mad that Ronnie left a growhawk in the front yard, but it was a great place to hide Easter eggs.

by Dorkmuffin April 24, 2019

chansey

a pink egg cuck
sometimes a green egg cuck

shiny chansey feck

by DorkMuffin January 04, 2019