Definitions by Dick Onchin
Arctic Carl
Performing a traditional hot Carl, the act of putting seran-wrap on ones face and proceeding to take a hot steamy shit on the seran-wrap, thus letting them feel the warmth of the poo on their face, but performed in an intentional, extremely cold environment for maximum warmth effect.
Scenarios might be, but not limited to, on a walk in refrigerator or freezer, outside on a blistering cold day, while hiking on the mountains or just dropping down the AC temperature at home.
Scenarios might be, but not limited to, on a walk in refrigerator or freezer, outside on a blistering cold day, while hiking on the mountains or just dropping down the AC temperature at home.
I met the new waitress in the walk-in freezer after we closed. She brought the seran wrap from the prep station and I laid out the most steamy Arctic Carl I could push.
Despite the subzero temperatures outside, Bethany surprised me while I was making a snow angel by slapping some seran and dropping an Arctic Carl. It was so warm I asked if she might have a fever.
Despite the subzero temperatures outside, Bethany surprised me while I was making a snow angel by slapping some seran and dropping an Arctic Carl. It was so warm I asked if she might have a fever.
Arctic Carl by Dick Onchin November 15, 2020
Undercarriage Makeover
To wash, clean, tidy and if necessary, shave and trim, one’s genitals, taint or asshole. All three if circumstances warrant.
The prostitute dashed into the Wawa bathroom to do an undercarriage makeover after her last John filled her like a Boston cream donut.
The humidity was so swamp ass inducing that I had to freshen with an undercarriage makeover.
I gave myself and entire undercarriage makeover before my Grindr hook up arrived.
I looked like Chewbacca’s face down there so I cleaned up with an undercarriage makeover.
The humidity was so swamp ass inducing that I had to freshen with an undercarriage makeover.
I gave myself and entire undercarriage makeover before my Grindr hook up arrived.
I looked like Chewbacca’s face down there so I cleaned up with an undercarriage makeover.
Undercarriage Makeover by Dick Onchin November 14, 2020
Covid Turkey Slap
Due to social distancing, simulating the performance of a traditional Turkey Slap by swinging the penis back and forth, 6 ft away from her face with no physical contact.
While not as physically satisfying as it would be under non-pandemic circumstances, the act of lovingly pseudo-slapping your partner in the face with an erect or semi erect penis is still a coveted tradition especially around Thanksgiving.
While not as physically satisfying as it would be under non-pandemic circumstances, the act of lovingly pseudo-slapping your partner in the face with an erect or semi erect penis is still a coveted tradition especially around Thanksgiving.
My hot cousin came to town for thanksgiving. While i normally would give her a Turkey slap after everyone went to bed, we kept our distance and had to settle for the covid Turkey slap instead. I gave her a little helicopter penis action as well.
Covid Turkey Slap by Dick Onchin November 13, 2020
Indian Star
Oh man we went to Tandoori House last night for dinner. I’m paying the price today when an Indian star.
I need some salve for my tender little Indian star.
I need some salve for my tender little Indian star.
Indian Star by Dick Onchin November 11, 2020
Chowder Lip
She was doing sloppy top on me so good I was bout to bust so I pulled her head back and finished myself off by hand and gave her the old chowder lip.
Chowder Lip by Dick Onchin November 10, 2020
Hunting Kernels
I was hunting kernels last night with the old lady. Pulled a few out and wiped em off with her new blouse.
Man I might as well have been a corn farmer last night cause I was seriously hunting kernels with that filthy whore.
Man I might as well have been a corn farmer last night cause I was seriously hunting kernels with that filthy whore.
Hunting Kernels by Dick Onchin November 9, 2020