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Daedalus Suburbanus's definitions

turtley

Turtle-like, especially (but not only) in the sense of being slow.
I was late for work because the traffic was so turtley this morning.
by Daedalus Suburbanus November 2, 2010
mugGet the turtleymug.

I think I might have left the blender turned on

1: The most hilarious line ever spoken in King of the Hill. Hank Hill said this in Episode 10 of Season 1. Why was it so great? Well first, can you picture Hank Hill using a blender? Second, a blender is not something you can just leave on, because it's only on when you hold down the button.

2: A bizarre excuse to step outside for a cigarette when you don't want people to know you smoke.
(FROM KING OF THE HILL)

*Hank and Peggy are in bed.*
HANK: Uh, I got to go do some stuff. I think I might have left the blender turned on.
*Hank gets out of bed, goes outside, and lights up a cigarette.*
by Daedalus Suburbanus April 6, 2011
mugGet the I think I might have left the blender turned onmug.

telescope

One of many euphemistic terms for a penis. Most famously used in this context in the Big Bang Theory episode, "The Boyfriend Complexity." In that episode, Howard and Raj accidentally kissed each other in the control room for a telescope. The next day, when Leonard casually asked Howard and Raj what had happened, both of them freaked out, even though Leonard hadn't heard about the kiss.
(FROM THE BIG BANG THEORY)

*Sheldon and Leonard are at the table in the cafeteria. Raj joins them.*

LEONARD: Oh, how'd it go last night?

RAJ: Oh, you know, same old same old. Looked through a telescope, saw some stars, big move.

LEONARD: Really? You waited months for a time with that telescope. What happened?

RAJ: Why? You writing a book?

SHELDON: I'm going to propose a hypothesis. Last night, Raj accidentally made contact with an alien civilization, and has been ordered by the United States government to keep it a secret.

RAJ: Nothing happened! Can we please just change the subject?!

SHELDON: That sounds rehearsed. We are not alone.

*Howard walks over to the table.*

HOWARD: Hey.

LEONARD: Hey.

SHELDON: Hello.

HOWARD: Hey.

RAJ: Hey.

LEONARD: You get to play with Raj's big telescope last night?

*Howard and Raj both react with shock.*

HOWARD: Where'd that come from?!

RAJ: He never touched my telescope!!

HOWARD: Way to go shutting up!

RAJ: I did shut up, now you shut up!

HOWARD: Fine!

RAJ: Thank you!

RAJ: I can't believe you didn't call me this morning.
by Daedalus Suburbanus December 6, 2013
mugGet the telescopemug.

Rebecca Black

A singer who takes two sentences to tell us she has to have a bowl of cereal in the morning.
REBECCA BLACK: Gotta have my bowl. Gotta have cereal.
LISTENER: Now why the heck didn't she just say, "Gotta have my bowl of cereal?".
by Daedalus Suburbanus April 26, 2011
mugGet the Rebecca Blackmug.

The New Adventures of Old Christine

A hilarious sitcom starring Julia Louis-Dreyfus.

The show was about a middle-aged divorced woman named Christine Campbell. She is known as "Old Christine" because her ex-husband Richard's new girlfriend also happens to be named Christine (she is known as "New Christine" because of this). Old Christine lives with her son Richie and her younger brother Matthew. She owns a gym with her best friend Barb. She sends her son Ritchie to a fancy private school and frequently has to deal with the school's two "Meanie Moms" (two rich, blonde, queen-bee moms who always look down on Old Christine).

Old Christine is extremely dumb. For example, she prides herself in being politically active, but her idea of political activism is voting on American Idol. Similarly, she often forgets basic information about herself, such as her age. Richard and New Christine are usually more intelligent than her, but both of them have their moments of stupidity too. Barb and Matthew are usually the voices of reason, but even they have issues.

At first, the show was great. It received nine Emmy nominations and won an Emmy in its first season. By the fifth season, however, the show had degenerated, so it was cancelled.
It's too bad The New Adventures of Old Christine got cancelled. It was really good up until season 5.
by Daedalus Suburbanus June 30, 2012
mugGet the The New Adventures of Old Christinemug.

phonecuffing

When somebody calls you when you're about to start something, in the middle of something, or just want to be left alone. The caller just won't let you go and just keeps on talking and talking and talking and talking and talking. The caller might talk about subjects that you don't know anything about and/or have absolutely no interest in, and just when it seems like he or she is about to let you go, he or she jumps on to a whole new subject. You can be stuck in this situation for hours.
phone rings

VICTIM: Hello?
PHONECUFFER: Hey, there's this one really weird question on the physics homework
VICTIM: Okay, let's see…

10 minutes later

PHONECUFFER: Yeah, thanks man.
VICTIM: No problem.
PHONECUFFER: By the way, did you hear about that idiot?
VICTIM: Oh yeah!

16 minutes later

PHONECUFFER: But then I realized that 5 Hour Energy is better than Vault.
VICTIM: That's cool, but I've got this paper that's due in 72 hours.
PHONECUFFER: I see.

27 minutes later

PHONECUFFER: And so I dug it up on YouTube last night and I thought it was mediocre.
VICTIM: Yeah…
PHONECUFFER: I mean people think he's an idiot…
VICTIM: Un-huh…
PHONECUFFER: But really he can be hilarious, like when…
VICTIM: (thinks "I have a paper to work on and he's talking about the crappiest move that was ever made.")

38 minutes later

PHONECUFFER: But then I realized that if you stand eight feet away, you get the most accuracy.
VICTIM: That's cool, but I really need to work on that paper.

22 minutes later

PHONECUFFER: So he just stared off into space and was like "Whoa!".
VICTIM: (monotone) That's weird. (thinks "I've told him about the paper six times and he's still phonecuffing me!")
by Daedalus Suburbanus June 1, 2010
mugGet the phonecuffingmug.

Ramsay World

A term that collectively refers to all the TV shows featuring Gordon Ramsay. That includes Hell's Kitchen, Kitchen Nightmares, The F Word, MasterChef, and Hotel Hell. All of them feature Gordon Ramsay being Gordon Ramsay. He's one of the best chefs in the world and has extremely high standards. When he encounters stupidity or bad food, he bluntly — if not furiously — calls it out, and he's perfectly willing to make a scene in the process. In America, Ramsey World is on the air almost year-round: at least one show will be on at any time; and when one of the shows featuring Ramsey goes on hiatus, the new season of one of the other series will premiere within a couple of weeks at most.
Right now, Hell's Kitchen is about halfway through the season. Kitchen Nightmares just ended, the new season of MasterChef is about to start, and there'll be a new season of Hotel Hell at some point; so Ramsay World is going to be on for at least several more months.
by Daedalus Suburbanus May 21, 2013
mugGet the Ramsay Worldmug.

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