Definitions by D. Finer

rectal benedict 

when someone takes a crap in your mouth through a piece of canadian bacon.

Does anyone have a toothbrush? I just had a rectal benedict!"

rectal benedict by D. Finer November 29, 2006

Oral Hersheiser 

Taking a dump in a person's mouth while smacking them in the forehead with a "meat bat." While various penetrations are highly encouraged, a true Oral Hersheiser must not include sexual consummation, as the eponymous baseball player holds the record for most "scoreless innings."

"You haven't had Scheiße till you've had an Oral Hersheiser!"

Oral Hersheiser by D. Finer November 29, 2006

brown taco 

Taking a turd, laying it in a woman's vulva, then eating it.

"Don't mind my breath, I've been eating brown taco!"

brown taco by D. Finer November 29, 2006

brown snatch 

Verb. To pluck a turd from someone's anus. Common with impacted colons.

"Don't shake my hand; I've just pulled a brown snatch."

brown snatch by D. Finer November 29, 2006

brown tefillin 

To take a crap on someone's hand and forehead. The scatalogical version of the orthodox religious practice.

"I got a brown tefillin when all I really wanted was a hug!"

brown tefillin by D. Finer November 29, 2006

jaspers 

Human sex-balls. Danglies.

"Open wide darlin', I've got a hankering to dunk my jaspers!"

jaspers by D. Finer November 29, 2006