Penile Shaft

The shaft of a man's penis. Or really, any penis for that matter.

"Hey there, you penile shaft!"

by Cockmonkey December 03, 2004

Loafy Loafington

Matt's other cat, and companion to Shitty Pancras. Lives on beanbag. Lives for turkey. Poops on floor when angered. May vomit profusely when turkey overeating occurs.

Hey Loafy Loafington, play a song for me...

by Cockmonkey December 14, 2004

Man Margarine

Secretions from a man's sack. Mmmmmmmm toasty.

"Golly, I could sure go for some Man Margarine right now. It's grrrrreat!"

by Cockmonkey December 03, 2004

Shitty Pancras

Matt's cat. She's small, she's white, she's retarded. Known for psychotic behavior, extreme idiocy, and clumsiness. Smells like poo. Often yellow when dirty. Avoid ass at all costs.

I had to lock Shitty Pancras out of the room because her yellow butt smelled.

by Cockmonkey December 14, 2004

Captain Gaylord

A total douchebag named Tim from the OC (the real one) who frequently does drugs, frequents prisons, and throws away his life. Has been known to have freaky sex on Matt's coffee table. Warning: Ass cheeks may be visible during coffee table coitus.

"Damn it Adrian, you didnt really invite Captain Gaylord to Europe with us did you?"

by Cockmonkey December 03, 2004

Cock Monkey

A term of endearment often used to refer to a person or object. Cock Monkey can carry a negative connotation as well, but is often used to show affection towards one another. A cock monkey is ofter a hairy sexy beast.

Last night while cuddling with him, I rubbed my hands through his chest hair. I love my little cock monkey!

by cockmonkey February 18, 2012