87 definition by Chernorizets Hrabr

What is this I see? Could it be... a nu-metal band that is actually good? I think it is!

There are more Jersey Rednecks than you once believed!

Jersey rednecks typically dwell in backwood areas within Philadelphian surburbs, where there is still plenty of rural land for the blue collar folk. Almost every Jersey redneck owns a chevy pickup truck, which they park in their "driveway", which is not really a driveway but an area of their lawn in which grass isn't growing. Their front yards are home to various appliances and vehicles that no longer function, somehow finding their way there. Jersey rednecks love Marlboro cigarettes (because Newports are for "negroes" and Camels are for "A-rabs"), Skoal, Budweiser, Natural Ice and especially Keystone. The origins of their slow southern accent is mysterious, though speculation reveals that it is probably from listening to too much Lynyrd Skynyrd. Instead of "you guys" they will say "youz guys", and "tuh'marry" instead of "tomorrow". The Jersey redneck's idea of a dream vacation is a week-long trip to Wildwood.

Tobacco tightly rolled into smokable paper. Smoking cigarettes on occassion (1-3 a day) or just socially is OK and not very harmful. Smoking a pack or even half a pack in a day is a sign that you need help. Some people love to preach about cigarettes and give you a lot of shit if they see you smoking one because they want to seem smart, or because they're little sXe virgins who are bitter about denying themselves the occassional pleasure. A popular insult to smokers is, "Yeah, YOU'RE cool..." causing the smoker to break the face of the preteen goth-punk who said it and use his eyes as an ashtray.

In my opinion, Camel Turkish Golds are the best cigarettes around, the worst being Newports or anything menthol. Marlboros are decent. Parliaments are overrated. USA's, though not great, are good in a pinch when you forgot your wallet and only have the change laying around your car.

Something everyone on urbandictionary.com believes their respective country has.

A band with a frontman that doesn't realize that he is NOT Kurt Cobain. Another pathetic rip-off band.

A (now) mainstream four-piece band categorized as pop punk, pop rock, emo, or combinations of the three. Known for their nasal vocalist, simplistic guitar riffs, basslines consisting of no more than four notes which cannot even be successfully played at a live show, and "poetic" lyrics such as "WE'RE GOIN" DOWN, DOWN, ENALURBLYURAAHLL...", it's no surprise that Fall Out Boy is one of the most popular rock acts today, particularly among 14-21 year old females and males confused about their orientation.

Fall Out Boy differs from similar bands in that their bassist acts as (or tries to act as) the frontman of the group, without singing or adequately playing his instrument. Though he ranks as the least talented member of the band, Pete Wentz garners most of the group's media attention, being the only 6 while surrounded by 3's and 4's. Pete also writes the "brilliant lyrics" indecipherably crooned by singer Patrick Stump. In an attempt to appear quirky and clever, titles of Fall Out Boy songs are usually a sentence long. The exposure of Wentz' genitalia is irrelevent and was likely brought to the media forefront by the band itself as a failed publicity stunt.

Taking note of the band's lack of... everything, it is a mystery how Fall Out Boy is successfully marketed. There are no timeless hooks, no particularly attractive band members to get the teenyboppers riled up, nothing instrumentally impressive or innovative, and nothing that hasn't been done before several times (and with less ego) by Blink 182 or even Simple Plan. The success of Fall Out Boy remains an enigma, as well as a trademark of the tastelessness of teenage youth and anyone who refers to themself as emo.

Slang for bluetooth device, derived from its popularity amongst the black community as the newest form of tacky, high-tech "bling". Insecure negroes who want to put on an air of importance wear them when not necessary (i.e. any time not spent driving), even when nobody calls them all day. When they do, however, they will talk loudly in public whilst flailing their limbs about to demonstrate the wonder of wireless technology and the money they spent avoiding child support payments.