CB4PEE-OH!'s definitions

Mertard

A ridiculous attempt at swimming resulting in near drowning.

"You look like a Mertard swimming like that"
"gliding through water as gracefully as a full blown Mertard"

by CB4PEE-OH! July 1, 2019

Bithin's Bridge

The Gooch. Both female & Male.
The perineum, the fun bit.

Saint Bithin rested his chin upon Bithin's Bridge whilst deciding to push his tongue into the vagin or into the Bungholio.

by CB4PEE-OH! March 26, 2022

Shartifact

Upon moving into a new house and finding a shartifact in the garden such as gnome or sundial

I found this Shartifact by the pond, it’s one of those cheap shitty garden ornament things sold in a rip off garden centre bought by old cunts with too much money and not enough taste.

by CB4PEE-OH! April 4, 2020

Oapeado

A younger person who has sex with pensioners.
(These people are usually called Lee Golding.)

Not in the slightly kinky Mrs Robinson way.
The Oapeado is into humping grey matter.
They will not be put off by false teeth or incontinence infact it's often a desirable attribute.

Oh my goodness, you fucked her/him/they!
They're like 80yrs old, you Oapeado!

by CB4PEE-OH! August 13, 2025