Bottom Ford's definitions

Begmore

1. A utopian distiller of single-malt scotch that would be located on the Isle of Islay if it existed.

2. A figurative single-malt scotch that, when consumed by house pets, causes them to demand more treats and attention than they deserve.

“Your dog won't keep his nose out of my dinner. He’s been hitting the Begmore too hard.”

by Bottom Ford January 4, 2010

hurled

“Hurled” is a fine substitute for any “world” prefixing something you don’t like.

That “world” music is really “hurled” music if you ask me.

by Bottom Ford March 1, 2010

The Bourne Redundancy

1. The title of Matt Damon’s new spy thriller.

2. May refer to any extraneous or inferior movie sequel.

“You seen that new Matt Damon flick?”

“The Bourne Redundancy? Derivative, man.”

by Bottom Ford March 14, 2010

extravirg

One of those annoying virgins who is super-friendly

Bottom went to his class reunion, which had been organized by an extravirg with nothing better to do.

by Bottom Ford March 4, 2010

independently destitute

Describes an unemployed friend who always has time for fun. This friend has a taste for luxury, but no money.

What does Bottom do for a living?
Nothing, man. He’s independently destitute.

by Bottom Ford June 12, 2009

veggie del norte

1. vegetables that have migrated so far north they have become frozen.
2. Any kind of frozen vegetable.

Bottom doesn’t have any fresh salad fixings, but he can serve veggie del norte anytime.

by Bottom Ford May 2, 2010

Mill Creek, WA

The world’s best hiding place. You would never go there expecting to find someone interesting. Zero stalkers. Zero paparazzi. Zero vampires.

“I heard Matt Damon bought a house in Mill Creek, WA.”
“Smart move. No one will look for him there.”

by Bottom Ford May 4, 2010