Big aldo's definitions

unshatisfied

Constipated, unable to perform a natural bowel movement

I’ve been to the bathroom 3 times, but alas i remain unshatisfied

by Big aldo July 13, 2019

buzzburns

The act of deliberately shaving of your sideburns to leave yourself looking like a cross between chopper reid and a sex offender

‘Dev’ from coronation street has ‘sideburns’ but Roy Cropper has dem ‘buzzburns’

by Big aldo July 13, 2019

emotional masterbation

The act of watching heart wrenching documentaries or reading about celebs having miscarriages to indulge in such feelings for self gratifying reasons while having the safety net of knowing it’s happening to them and not you.

Oh i see your watching that show ‘ miscarriage- my story’ , pure emotional masterbation, a horrible thing to do.

by Big aldo October 15, 2020

patter plagiary

The act of repeating the genuis and wit of another to appear funny

Stop using my terms when i’m not in to new people, that’s pure patter plagiary son.

by Big aldo October 30, 2019

diversity cake

The predictably formulaic ingredients of a programme or ad where almost every group is somehow represented almost as if someone was baking a cake... add a black guy
Few sprinkles of gay
Pinch of disability
Crack a few straight white males
And mix with female lead and bake on channel 11 for half an hour

Oh gawd did you see that ad? Another diversity cake baked and ready to go

by Big aldo February 7, 2020

fryer tuck number

The worst form of balding, as this form of balding convinces the man that they aren’t really bald because the thinning takes place (out of sight out of mind) at the back/top of the head creating a rediculous specticle for anyone standing behind the person

Just go bald at the front like a normal cunt, ya mad fryer tuck number lol

by Big aldo July 13, 2019

pile of washing

When you’re so fat that when you sit down and lean forward, you’re midriff resembles folded laundry

Man this tunic’s too tight, i look like a pile of washing

by Big aldo July 13, 2019