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Angus McCracken's definitions

Ball Vents

The holes that occur in your underwear, naturally, over time allowing your balls to get proper air circulation

The lack of ball vents is often the single.biggest contributing factor to someone unexpectantly and inappropriately whipping out their nuts.
My new underwear have no ball vents so my nuts feel like they are on fire.
by Angus McCracken January 24, 2020
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Granny Choker

The pubes you hide in your Granny's asthma inhaler just for shits and giggles.
When the pubes from the Granny choker hit the back of her throat Granny almost died.
by Angus McCracken January 25, 2020
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Purple Headed Darth Vader

How nerds at Comic Con refer to their penis while trying to hit on other nerds.
Hey baby wanta go back to my place and check out my purple headed darth vader - the force is strong in him. Regret it you will not.
by Angus McCracken January 24, 2020
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Cum Bubbles

What occurs when one farts immediately following having a load dropped into their ass.
The worst thing about cum bubbles is when they burst all you smell are farts.
by Angus McCracken January 25, 2020
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Safety Plank

The wooden board you strap horizontally across your ass to prevent you from falling into the cavernous vagina your are about to slam.
I told him to use a safety plank but oh no he knew better. Dude we had to call the fire department to get him out of her vagina.
by Angus McCracken January 25, 2020
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Bag Full of Monkeys

Describes the situation where more than 2 guys need to share the same condom with one girl.
I'd rather be a part of a bag full of monkeys than get a chick preggers. I'm a good citizen like dat.
by Angus McCracken January 24, 2020
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Furry Fisting

Verb

1. What you do at Grandma's house while she sleeps. Prancing around her house naked you grab a fist full of her fur coat creating a furry pocket with your fist; into which you masturbate furiously until you have giz drenched her chinchilla or Granny wakes up.
Grandma was some pissed on Sunday when she caught me furry fisting myself. Not sure if it was on account of all the giz or cause I spilled all the mints outta her pockets.
by Angus McCracken January 25, 2020
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