Definitions by All Bets Hedged

Serving Up Gems 

When a jewel thief defecates stolen jewels.

He knew when he ate the stolen necklace he would eventually be serving up gems.

Serving Up Gems by All Bets Hedged February 17, 2021

Scumble 

People who get aroused by the scum on urinal toilet plumbing fixtures.

It is gross, but he is a scumble.

Scumble by All Bets Hedged February 11, 2021

Lick the Doorknob 

A homeless person performing cunnilingus on a prostitute.

He knew she got around but he was still ready to lick the doorknob.

Lick the Doorknob by All Bets Hedged February 10, 2021

Cleaning the Toothpaste Cap 

Having imminent diarrhea that is held in by previously formed solid feces within the bowel tract. Upon pushing out the solid mass, diarrhea follows with ease.

After trying all the laxities on the market I tried some liquid magnesium and was very shortly cleaning the toothpaste cap.

Cleaning the Toothpaste Cap by All Bets Hedged February 10, 2021

Dog Scream 

The noise emitted from a person when cold water is thrown on the back of a male whose penis has swollen to the point that he is "stuck" inside the sexual partner's anus.

I thought it was called a yelp but my urologist told me it was called a dog scream.

Dog Scream by All Bets Hedged February 8, 2021

Decking the Attic 

Placing a fist that was recently used for an anal fisting into someone’s mouth.

When he said he could handle anything I showed him his error in judgement by decking the attic.

Decking the Attic by All Bets Hedged February 5, 2021

Pickles on the Side

When a pansexual propositions a transitioning male-to-female and requests that they abstain from penetration until specifically requested during the sexual acts.

Some like to call it ‘when Harry met Sally’, but in Texas we call it Pickles on the Side’

Pickles on the Side by All Bets Hedged February 4, 2021