48 definitions by Alex Stockwell

chubby chaser

A guy who doesn't subscribe to the notion that women are only attractive if they look like mummified corpses.

What are you, some kind of chubby chaser?

If I can call you a necrophiliac, than yes.

by Alex Stockwell November 11, 2007

Paris Hilton

Ugly, scrawny, stupid cunt who the media wants us to think is sexy, due to one of her ancestors getting into the business of renting rooms which, much like Paris herself, are often completely coated in semen.

The next guy who says he wants to fuck Paris Hilton, I'm gonna stab him in the eye with one of those pens that you click the tip in and out.

by Alex Stockwell August 2, 2008

put your foot through a Van Gogh

To ruin something beautiful by trying to improve it.

You think I should lose weight?

Hey, don't put your foot through a Van Gogh, now.

by Alex Stockwell November 10, 2007

pulling a dubya

To pretend to be stupid to get people to drop their guard, as many liberals(ie. Patton Oswalt) suspect President Bush of doing.

Patton Oswalt on "pulling a dubya": Bush isn't stupid, he's evil. There's a difference. When he talks about bombing Iraq, he's really eloquent and poetic, but when he talks about actually caring about another human being, that's when he tends to say things like "It's hard to put food on your family".

by Alex Stockwell June 6, 2007

guilty jerk

When you masturbate while thinking of somebody you hate, sometimes a celebrity.

Guy 1: You thought about Lindsay Lohan last night?

Guy 2: I know, I hate myself.

And now, because it won't work without it, guilty jerk.

by Alex Stockwell July 31, 2009

incest

An act that is apparently less blasphemous than homosexuality, according to millions of Southerners.

I would commit incest before I fucked a guy!

by Alex Stockwell November 11, 2007

blue ribbon committee

Political slang for "What are you gonna do about it?"

I will be putting together a blue ribbon committee consisting of myself and Miss Childs.

by Alex Stockwell April 2, 2009