When a (male) person attaches a phallic object (typically a plant or a household item) to his groin area with the goal of simulating an obscenely large penis.
Jim entered the room and saw that his friend Tom was sitting there, playing Call of Duty. Jim too wanted to play but Tom didn't let him. Jim took a nearby elongated cactus and placed it between his legs, pointing at Tom.
Tom screamed: "Put my cactus down, I am so tired of your penile projections!"
Cigarette: Northern slang for a cigarette, used oft by mashed up mancunian ravers becasue of the resemblance of a hot(electric)stove to the end of a lit cigarette. Originated circa 1991 in the early halcyon days of the rave culture; we speculate during a drug fuelled hallucination by said manc.
'fuck me noel, i am bolloxed, is that a ciggy in your mouth, or the stove from me 'nans kitchen'/
General use: 'Give us a stove you cunt'
A hardo is a person who tries extremely hard at everything. Most times a hardo will try very hard at things that do not require excessive effort. For example, sports practices, gym class, etc.
Wow did you see Jack at practice today? What a hardo!