Masturbating. This is in reference to the Dusty Rhodes (former WWE wrestler) ad campaign where he says “Don’t be silly...Don’t play with your Willy “ on behalf of the American Board for Sexual Wellbeing.
Your father stands in the corner of the room. As you gaze into his eyes you contemplate the strike of the leather you receive for snorting your grandmother's ashes. He waits. He only says the obligatory phrase "I'm not mad. Just pretty disappointed." you never speak of the moment again...