brett burkhardt's definitions
Someone who spends all their time watching DIY shows, going to DIY websites, and reading DIY books but never actually does any DIY projects to completion.
Maggie’s roommate Sophia is a real DIY Dilettante. She’s got at least three dozen half finished projects lying around their apartment and she still hasn’t finished replacing the faucet in the 2nd bathroom.
"Honey, you need to face facts. You're a DIY Dilettante and you need to finish at least one of these projects. I mean, how hard is it to finish painting the living room wall?"
"Honey, you need to face facts. You're a DIY Dilettante and you need to finish at least one of these projects. I mean, how hard is it to finish painting the living room wall?"
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the DIY Dilettante mug.I was horrified when I saw that aunt Mary spent over a thousand dollars a month on crap from QVC but when she told me she returned all but $20 worth of stuff I knew she was a real QVC crack head.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the QVC Crack Head mug.Kim was a classic Secret Smoker. She would lecture her kids about the evils of smoking all day but, come 2 am, she would sneak behind the garage and relax with a nice cigarette.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Secret Smoker mug.A girl who acts like an out of control monster while planning her sweet 16 and should get an ass whooping instead of a party. She’ll also make outrageous demands and try to waste as much money on this event as possible.
“DADDDYYYYY!!!!! I wanted a BLACK Escalade, not a white one! You’re ruining my life!” Screamed the Sweet 16 Succubus
The Sweet 16 Succubus who’s parents had rented the yacht was rolling around screaming and crying on the floor like a five year old because the roses aren’t the right shade of pink. What a bitch.
The Sweet 16 Succubus who’s parents had rented the yacht was rolling around screaming and crying on the floor like a five year old because the roses aren’t the right shade of pink. What a bitch.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Sweet 16 Succubus mug.A person is whorephaned when they are left behind at the bar while their friend/ride leaves to have a one night stand with a stranger
Tina hated going to the bar with her hot roommate because she always ended up being whorephaned with no ride home by 1 am.
by Brett Burkhardt March 9, 2008
Get the whorephaned mug.When you’re waiting on hold for someone and know that the second you answer another call or check another line they’ll answer and hang up when you don’t answer right away.
I’ve been a hold hostage for 8 minutes now. I know that if that whore in accounts receivable picks up when I try and answer this other line she’ll disconnect.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Hold Hostage mug.Named after the Greek prophetess. A way of saying “I told you so” or to remind people not to complain to your ass about shit because you warned them all about the problems you saw coming a mile away.
I filed a Cassandra Claim when you hired his dumb ass so don't start in with me. I told you he was a sticky fingered shifty bastard and you still hired him so it’s your fault that he stole over $9,000 worth of stock.
I’ve got a Cassandra Claim on your boyfriend cheating on you, Beth, because I warned your ass that I saw his car parked in front of the porn store just about every night on my way home from work.
I’ve got a Cassandra Claim on your boyfriend cheating on you, Beth, because I warned your ass that I saw his car parked in front of the porn store just about every night on my way home from work.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Cassandra Claim mug.