Loss of vision or memory, and complete bewilderment as to how you got home safely and in one piece means only one thing, that your beer angel was watching over you.

There's no need to send another text saying

"*fucking" Mike, I know and give autocorrect license when you say "my ducking brother is late again"

Man, that threesome was nuts. Those two girls let me make a balance transfer and everything.

Wow! You're taller than I expected. I'm Zoom Struck

Anna was talking for the whole period about her ex and Leslie was tired of it and said, "Will you shut up already he's a rego, he doesnt like you anymore. Take a hint"

I bet they went all seven handle circus.