A tourist-orientated town in the South of England, with a population of 50,000.
The young
people of Salisbury can be divided into three main groups: pikeys, squaddies and the posh kids.
Salisbury's pikeys are the most visible group, usually seen roaming the town in packs. They are indigenous to the Friary and Bemerton Heath, but are known to go to
McDonalds and Burger
King in order to feed. Other popular points of congregation include Tesco Metro, Poundland and the Library Steps.
The squaddies are usually only visible on Saturday nights, trying to pick up
18-year-old posh
girls in Whiterooms and fighting each other and pikeys. The rest of the week they are busy invading Third World nations, shooting
people and feeling good about themselves for it.
The posh kids spend most of their time either at one of the town's
two grammar schools or at one of the copious private schools. At these institutions they learn how to vote for the Conservative Party as well as the art of
banter. In their spare time they drink
tea in Starbucks or Nero, or smoke undersized spliffs in the Cathedral Close. At the age of
18 or 19, almost all posh kids emigrate to "classier" (read: preppier) locales such as Oxford, Cambridge and Exeter. The Guild Hall Steps are a meeting point for posh kids with identity crises and lack of direction in life.
