Shit Paper

What you use to remove feces from your ass. Sometimes newspaper, napkins, and paper towls. Never magazine pages, too slick.

See Also: Corn Cob

Damn! No toilet paper. Looks like I'm gonna have to go get some shit paper.

by BillyGoat November 15, 2002

Shit Paper

A colloquial term for the flimsy, nigh see-through, but yet sandpapery tissue in most businesses that is intended for wiping one's ass. This paper usually falls apart upon contact with shit and becomes soggy, while still punishing your hole with 100 grit dingleberries.

The shit paper at work sucks! Not only is my ass still covered in shit, but I feel like I wiped with a lava rock!

by Jackieboy17 July 11, 2017

Shit Paper

A colloquial term for the flimsy, nigh see-through, but yet sandpapery tissue in most businesses that is intended for wiping one's ass. This paper usually falls apart upon contact with shit and becomes soggy, while still punishing your hole with 100 grit dingleberries.

The shit paper at work sucks! Not only is my ass still covered in shit, but I feel like I wiped with a lava rock!

by Jackieboy17 July 12, 2017

shit paper shield

noun. barrier a person, usually suffering from some level of OCD, erects between their bare ass before being seated to drop the kids off at the pool (take a shit). usually construced with toilet paper unless the seat wrappers are provided.

Carl: I got to go drop a deuce!

Heather: don't forget to build your shit paper shield OCD boy.

by DaStalka June 3, 2010

Shit Paper Soccer

When you dip a roll of toilet paper in diesel, light it on fire and kick it around like a soccer ball.

Oi mate we playing some shit paper soccer tonight?
Yeah cunt, you bring the shit paper I'll bring the diesel.

by Awesom0h4000 June 3, 2020

oh-shit paper

the last piece of toilet paper that left after doing "the deal"

i was stucked at the public-toilet for an hour cuz' there allways an "oh-shit paper" on there

by Yoni zabari February 20, 2007

oh shit im out of toilet paper

1.That critical moment when you are taking a dump and you realize that you'll be wiping your ass with a sock, since the facilities you have entered, cannot supply a substantial amount of toilet paper for your needs.

2.Commonly used phrase in a minority neighborhood.

Owen cried out in agony: "oh shit im out of toilet paper", after he finished his business in some random guy's house.

by Djw14 April 2, 2011